Page 42 of Bad Decisions & Back Roads

I crossed my arms, not to shut him out but to hold myself together.“That’s not fair.”

“I think it’s honest.”

My heart still raced and my lips still tingled.My whole body still leaned toward him even as everything in my head screamed:caution.

“You kissed me.Twice.”I held up two fingers like he couldn’t count.

“Yes.”No hesitation.No apology.“You kissed me back.I’d do it again, but there’s a lot in my life already that needs me.”His drifted back to Sofia.“Are you going to run again?”

The words sank in.My gaze fell to the dark purple marks on my wrists.Then back to him.“I might have to if me being here puts people at risk again.”

“Gia—”

I moved before he could say anything else.If I stood there, I’d crack open.I gathered my things with hands that didn’t feel steady, like they belonged to someone else.

“Josh or one of the equine vets at the clinic can help you from here,” I said, already turning away.“For what it’s worth…” My throat tightened around the words.“I’m sorry.”

Everything I’d buried clawed upward, sharp and impossible to hold down any longer.If I kept it inside, it would destroy what little was left of me.

I forced myself to look at him.“What I felt for you back then was so much.I didn’t want to, but I had to leave.”

Pain flashed across his face, raw and unguarded.“You said you couldn’t love me.”

A strangled laugh caught in my chest—half sob, half disbelief at my own stupidity.“No.I said it wrong.”My eyes burned.“I wasn’tsupposedto love you.I needed us to not feel what we did, not when I had to leave.That’s what I meant.Not that I didn’t.”

I pressed a fist hard against my chest like it might stop the ache splitting me open.“Whatever it is that makes your heart belong somewhere else, I felt that for you.”

“You stillleft me.”His voice was rough, scraped hollow.“I gave you a way out.Gia.”My name came out raw and strangled.“I would’ve given you everything.Yet, you never tried to tell me you were alive after that first day.Not an email or a letter or anything.I tried.I called.”

“I know,” I whispered.A few tears slipped free, which I brushed away.My breath shook.“I wish it hadn’t happened.That I wasn’t forced to leave.”I dropped my head and tried to summon courage.“We had our shot.I can’t promise not to run again, not if staying might get people hurt.”

He nodded, accepting.

I stepped back, reeling.Somewhere deep inside I had expected him to fight for us.Maybe that was selfish.Maybe I should be the one to try harder.

I grabbed my packed duffel of supplies and forced myself to leave.

* * *

TIMOTHY

I gatheredSofia in my arms and carried her back to the house.She barely stirred when I tucked her into bed and pulled the blanket over her.

The moment I eased her door shut my phone rang.

Josh.

“Do I have a nephew yet?”I asked.

A laugh rumbled through the line.“You do.Eight pounds, four ounces, loud as hell.Erika’s doing great.Mom and Dad are headed home now.How’s the horse?”

“Mare is fine.Filly’s strong.”I swallowed hard.“Gia took off.She saved your horse.Why did you call her in?She had a long, rough day yesterday.”

“She’s the best.I probably could’ve asked Dr.Tori, but Gia always gets it done.No fuss.No drama.Just makes it happen.How’d you do with her there?”Josh asked carefully.“Did you behave?”

“Yeah.Sure.I mean… Gia and I…” The words dried up.I sat hard on my sofa.

“Gia and you what?”Josh’s voice sharpened.“Please tell me you didn’t behave like a dick just because she’s a McClary.”