Page 156 of Kick the Candle (Knight Games 2)
I straddled his body and lowered myself to a squat over him, not even worrying that I was naked and exposed. I wanted to be at his level to talk to him and there was nothing he hadn't seen before. "I'm not so much learning as remembering. Some things I know from copying into my database. Others just pop into my head when I least expect them."
"You were amazing tonight. Strong. Intelligent."
"I thought you were unconscious."
"I was in and out, but I saw enough."
I sighed. "I got lucky. If Julius hadn't shown up to challenge Bathory, I'd probably be a heart lighter." I rubbed the spot on my chest where the vampire had dug in her nails.
"Judging by the storm you called, I'm not sure you needed Julius at all."
"I couldn't hold it for long."
"Not everyone would have thought to use Soleil as you did, especially after she'd been compromised by the nightmare. How did you know the mud's effect wasn't more than skin deep?"
"I didn't. I just knew I couldn't take them all out on my own and hoped for the best."
He nodded, eyes traveling down the length of my arm as if he'd just noticed I was naked.
"I left the Book of Flesh and Bone with Soleil and Silas. Do you think that was a mistake?"
"No. I've known Soleil for over one hundred years. She'll guard it with her life. And I believe Silas is as trustworthy."
"Me too."
In the silence that followed, the fluorescent bathroom light suddenly became annoying, competing with the gentle glow of the candle. On a whim, I raised a hand and blew a strong breath, willing the lights off. I meant to throw the switch. Instead the bulb exploded in a shower of sparks. "Whoops."
"I never liked that bulb anyway."
I watched him for a second, his gray eyes twinkling crisp and clear in the candlelight, more human than usual. His lips twitched, and I broke into laughter.
"I'm going to clean you up." I nodded toward the full tub and tugged at the bottom edge of his shredded sweater. "This needs to come off."
He obliged, sitting up a little so I could peel it over his head. The shirt snagged on his wounds, dried to the skin with so much blood, and he cried out as I pulled it off.
"I'm sorry," I said. "I'll be more careful."
I removed his shoes and socks, then helped him stand and stripped off his jeans. Slowly, I helped him lower himself into the warm water. He winced as the liquid hit the lacerations. I climbed in behind him so that he was leaning against my chest, his waist between my thighs. The tub was large, but still he had to bend his knees to fit.
With a washcloth, I started with his face, removing the layers of blood, sweat, and what I thought might be tears. He allowed me to do it, didn't even try to pry the cloth from my hands. I was thankful for that. I wanted to do it.
I soaped up the cloth and moved to his right hand, scrubbed each finger, circled his palm, up the inside of his wrist to the elbow and back down his forearm before lowering the trail of lather into the water to rinse away. I started on his other hand.
"There's something I want to say to you," I began. I needed to get this off my chest, to begin with a clean slate.
"I am listening."
"The Book of Light showed me some things about our first lifetime together, the day you became my caretaker. When I go back into my memories, I don't just see what happened, I feel as I did that day. I don't just remember events, I experience them."
He nodded.
"Rick, I think I pressured you into becoming my caretaker. Clearly you didn't know exactly what I was or what committing yourself to me entailed. I trapped you, in a way."
At my coaxing, he leaned forward so I could wash his back. While I did, I waited for his response. One breath, two breaths, the guilt weighed down my chest.
"I knew enough," he finally said. He flopped back down against me as if the effort of sitting was too much for him.
To give us both a moment, I resumed washing his chest, careful around his wounds, and tried to reposition to reach his legs. He felt what I was trying to do and pivoted, settling across the tub from me, so that we were face to face.
