Page 13 of Scar Tissue

Quiet fills the air between us as his eyes settle on me with a certain softness that wasn’t there a minute ago. “I also don’t think that happiness is something that youfind.I think if you go looking for it, it’s bound to evade you. Instead, as I mentioned earlier, it’s something that we control. Something we’re meant to build rather than have our life spell out for us.”

“But if it were that simple, don’t you think everyone would be happy?”

He runs a hand through his hair, a curl falling over his brow, and there’s something in the way that he does it that causes heat to pool low in my stomach. “Nobody is happy all of the time. But it doesn’t mean you give up, either. I’m pretty sure I saw a quote somewhere once that said,Nothing worth having comes easy.We have to fight for the moments when we do feel something.”

Nothing worth having comes easy…Oh my god. That used to be on the wall in my room. He still remembers that? My heart skips a beat as I stare at him. Exactly how much attention he had paid to the details inmylife when I thought he was only there for Miles. “You really remember that?” I finally ask, my voice barely a whisper.

He shrugs, playing nonchalant. “How could I forget? It meant enough to you that you put it on your wall like a mantra. And you meant something to me.Meansomething to me, even if you don’t believe it.”

The words hit me hard, causing me to collapse further into the cushion as though his words were a physical blow. I want to saysomething but I can’t get words to produce, so instead I just stare at him incredulously. But suddenly, a ring from down the hallway sounds, cutting the tension between us. He lets out a sound that’s between a sigh and a growl as he gets up and trudges down the hall without another word, leaving me to stew in whatever just transpired between us.

I’d been rearranging my room, trying to find calm in the chaos that seemed to be the only thing my teenage self could focus on. Nathan leaned against the doorway, his arms crossed, watching me with this mix of amusement and curiosity. The smirk that filed across his face as he took in the words above the headboard of my bed always had a way of causing butterflies to float about my stomach. I had just turned sixteen the day before, and was given the decal as a gift from my grandparents. At first I had been frustrated that I didn’t get something all other teenage girls get for their sweet sixteen, but then I realized how powerful that quote was in the same moment. If I wanted those things I pined after, materialistic and all, then I’d have to work for them. It spurred a sense of purpose in me from there on.

“That’s some intense shit for a teenage girl,” Nathan remarked, his voice low and eyes gleaming with that same unpredictable mix of affection and cynicism he only seemed to bring out with me.

“Yeah, well, I need something to keep me going,” I had said, not meeting his gaze. My hands shook slightly as I adjusted a cabinet, but I wasn’t sure if it was from the weight of the quote or the way he was watching me. Seven years separated us and I had a boyfriend anyway, so why did I like it? “Don’t you have something better to do?”

He had chuckled, ignoring my quip as he responded, “Does it work?”

“Maybe.” I had shrugged. “Only time will tell.”

The tension had been so thick that day and I swear I had been so close to telling him to come in and close the door, but the level of trouble that would’ve gotten us both in would’ve obliterated everything either of us had worked for. I had always had a crush on him, from the moment that he and Miles became friends, I just didn’t expect those feelings to still be lingering.

“I have to go.” His voice cuts through the silence causing me to jump. I was so lost in my thoughts, in the past, that I didn’t hear himcome back in. He’s fully dressed now, but he isn’t wearing what I’ve seen him go to work in this past week. I wonder where he’s going. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.” And dammit, if he isn’t wearing the same expression he did all those years ago. “I just wanted to let you know that I won’t be back for a while.” For a moment I can’t tell if it’s an apology, an explanation, or just a statement of fact.

I nod, even though I find myself not wanting him to leave for the first time since I’ve been here. But I don’t have the words to stop him. Could he be going to visit a girlfriend?

There’s no hint of female presence in the house besides my own, but it doesn’t mean she doesn’t have her own place. Maybe she’s staying away to give me space. But is she really okay with that? And how come he isn’t gone more often at night? The questions run wild through my brain and I find myself feeling a twinge of…no, that can’t be it. I rub my hands over my face, taking a deep breath, and deciding I should get ready for the day.

Chapter

Ten

NATHAN

The very last thing I wanted to do was leave Thea after it finally feels like we’ve made some progress, but when I saw that it was work who was calling, I knew I couldn’t just ignore it. Not when I was advised of a delicate situation where a young girl had managed to escape her captors and was able to get to help. I have no idea why they decided to call me in, considering I’m usually only involved with infiltration, but the only information I yielded was that this runs deeper than just the surface. Calling Fletcher on my way out the door, he picks up on the fourth ring.

“What?” His voice is abrasive, catching me off guard.

Opening my front door, I switch the phone to speaker while I start my car. “Somebody piss in your cereal, old man?”

In the background there’s a small giggle followed by a moan, and I know I’ve just interrupted something—no doubt the reason for the attitude I’m receiving.

“Say whatever you’re gonna say, Nathan, before I hang up the phone.”

Chuckling, my phone connects to Bluetooth. “You get a call from work?”

“Yes, and I ignored it. A little busy here, and I’m no longer required to answer their every beck and call, as you know.” Another moan, and a sound I would rather bleach from my memory.

“Well, whenever you’re done doingwhoyou’re doing, call me.” The call disconnects before I can hear anything else, thank god.

Knowing we took down Dylan’s uncle,The Wraith,there isn’t a single detail I can zero in on as to what makes this girl and her case so special. Unless they simply need me to look her over? If there is a reason they can’t take her to a normal hospital? But no. They have multiple options to choose from, so why me? The drive is roughly two hours to the closest hidden headquarters. They’re often disguised as a shop of some sort with most dealings holding place in the basement or the back of the building. Not to mention, the locations change frequently for security purposes, so I’ve never been to this one. The drive goes by in a blur of other vehicles, and music droning from the dashboard in the background as I remain lost in my own head—thoughts that primarily focus on Thea. In what feels like no time whatsoever, I’m pulling into the lot of what appears to be an auto repair shop.

Killing the engine, I scan the perimeter where nothing seems to be out of the ordinary. There are bystanders about the area and other vehicles in the parking lot—whether they belong to my colleagues and bosses is another unanswered question. I punch the code into the headrest of my vehicle and withdraw my weapon, tucking it securely in the waistband of my pants, just in case. I step out, approaching the side entrance to the building that otherwise reads asclosed.I knock in the rhythm I was advised as the password, and shortly thereafter, the latch on the door releases before it’s pulled open by a gentleman in a suit. I’ve never understood why they dress like that, it seems somewhat impractical to me…Too restricting.

“They’re through here.” He closes the door behind me before leading me to a large room with a table and chairs in the center of it, surrounded by several individuals who are focused on two towardthe far wall, facing away. The guy who welcomed me clears his throat and says, “Nathan’s arrived.”

The two who are facing the far wall I recognize as the agents who came to speak with Dylan after she was rescued—Carr and Dyer, I think were their names. But I don’t recognize anyone else. When they turn around, they reveal a small girl, she can’t be older than seventeen, who is wearing an oversized hoodie and leggings. But even under the clothing, I can tell she’s too skinny. There’s a look in her eyes that tells me she’s also been through too much, seen things a girl her age should never have to see.