Page 69 of The Illusion
"I took the day off."
"You didn't tell me."
He rolls his eyes. "I was unaware our vows included an agreement for me to report my every move to you."
My eyebrows go up so fast I'm shocked they don't wind up on the ceiling.
Devon closes her laptop and stands. "I guess I'll give you guys some space." She walks past me without making eye contact and disappears into her room.
I look at Asher. "The eye roll was a nice touch. Thanks for that, and for being a prick to me in front of Devon. What the fuck, Asher? We talked about this. But here you are, making decisions about our household without including me. Again. If she can't be left alone, we should be looking into a new therapist or a nurse to sit with her during the day. Not you hiding that you're not going to work so you can stay home with her."
He stands, his jaw tight, and looks at me like he loathes me. "Can we not do this right now?"
"Talk about our home? Our lives? The shit you’re doing?"
"Jesus, this is why I didn't tell you. The level of suspicion from you is unfuckingreal. You just want to fight."
"I'm not trying to fight," I hiss. "I'm trying to understand why you haven't told me her anxiety is escalating so much that you need to stay home."
"Because I knew you'd make it into a thing!”
"A thing?"
"Yes. A thing. Like you always fucking do. Like you're doingright now."
My head is pounding so hard I can barely think. "I'm bringing up a legitimate concern and asking simple questions."
"And I answered it. I stayed home because Devon needed me. That's it. There's no conspiracy here, Julie."
"I didn't say there was a conspiracy," I answer harshly.
"Then what's the problem?"
"The problem is that you're making decisions without me. You're shutting me out. And when I try to talk to you about it, you act like I'm being unreasonable."
"Because youarebeing unreasonable."
"How?"
"By being like this over something that isn't even a problem! I stayed home to help Devon. That's what you wanted, right? For me to be more involved? To support her?"
"That's not what I?—"
"Then what do you want, Julie? Because I can't keep up with your goddamn rules anymore."
I open my mouth to respond but he cuts me off.
"You know what? Enough. You're being a bitch. Devon can hear you and she's already upset. She doesn't need you on a tear about something that isn't even a problem. You're supposed to be a fucking adult, not a needy teenage brat who needs constant attention. Stop being an asshole."
The words hit me like a slap. My head is pounding. My vision is blurring at the edges. And I'm tired. So tired of fighting and being made to feel like I'm the problem. "Fine. I'll stop."
I turn and walk into our bedroom. I close the door. I pull the blackout curtains shut and lie down on the bed in the dark. And I don't come out or speak for the rest of the night.
The flowers arrive at the shop the next afternoon. They're beautiful. A massive arrangement of white roses and peonies in a crystal vase. The card is tucked inside.
I'm sorry about yesterday. I love you. Dinner reservations for our anniversary —A
Jamie sees them when she comes in and raises an eyebrow. "Those are pretty."
