Page 90 of Rest In Knotty Pieces

“Where were you before?”

“Here, but not. We have been surfacing; you just didn’t notice,” I snap thoroughly over this interrogation.

“Who punched me in the throat?” Pix snarls.

I hesitate, trying to recall the memory. “Looks like that was Raven.” I cluck my tongue. “Let’s get out of the rain. We have a long way to travel, and there is bound to be more of them coming.”

“Do you remember?” Roseland asks.

I look up at him. We, Raven, Raptor, and I have all been in love with him for ages, though he has never met any of us. I shake my head.

“The information about the night you almost died is information that only Raven has. She, Merle, and Dove have all the memories of what happened there. And Merle blocks it out.” I hesitate. “I am sorry, Aaron. I’m the one who keeps us alive and living. I make sure we eat, live, drink, and find shelter.”

His expression softens. “It’s not your fault, Kest.”

I preen at his use of my nickname…I look down, brushing my hair behind my ears, and beam when I see the golden orange tips have stayed in my black hair.

“This way,” I murmur. “I know a place we can go.”

Rolly lets out a pained sound.

It takes everything in me to ignore it and not turn and try to make it better. They follow me. I’m not sure what else they would do, but they can’t help it. I have the omega that they all want.

No, I am the omega they all want.

I’ve heard of omegas with shattered landscapes who meet packs who reject some of the alters. Would this pack reject us? The thought consumes me until I feel someone else pushing at my control.

“No, not yet. We’re not in danger.”

Raven and Raptor subside, trusting my assessment, but it leaves me highly conscious of the fact that I need to be more careful about my thoughts and feelings.

The cave is just a slit in the side of a cliff, but if you walk inside, it opens up into a mini-ecosystem where you can light a fire but are protected from the weather.

I found it on one of those brief moments Merle gave up control of the body while we were hiding.

I pick up sticks and bring them to Sage, who stares at me with a blank face.

“Can you start a fire?”

His expression is cold and alien, and it hurts.

He quickly starts a fire while I strip off, hanging my soaking clothes up to dry.

“You’re naked!” Rolly squeaks.

I look down at myself. “Wow, I sure am. How about that?” With a little salute at the suddenly speechless alphas, I step into the heated pool and sink down under the water.

I hold my breath for as long as I can, then burst up through the water, laughing as I roll to float on my back.

“Merle doesn’t like anyone seeing her scars,” Pix says pointedly.

I clench my jaw, beyond irritated with them now.

“This is my body, too. They are my scars. I was the one who got them, who made us eat when the others wanted to die. I’m the one who suffered through the pain of their healing. Why can’t I wear them? They aren’t something I’m ashamed of, Omega; they are something I survived.”

Pix sits on his heels and stares at me. “You are bold, loud, and confrontational.”

“Strong is the word you’re looking for. I’m not going to fawn and cuddle up to you as a broken omega needing fixing. I’m going to stand by your side, wearing my own wounds and building a life for us.”