Page 52 of The Tenets of Man

My eyes flood with tears. How would I explain to this woman that I feel guilty for using medication when I’ve been told repeatedly that any pain associated with periods is a “natural consequence for being the weaker sex”? I’m probably just hormonal. “Thank you.”

I toss back the small pills she hands me while she slides the box across the table toward me. “This is a reusable menstrual disc. You can wear this for up to twelve hours, wash it with soap and water every day, then boil it at the end of your cycle for sanitation. We also have washable pads if insertion or discomfort is an issue.”

I study the flat, squishy disc. “This should work fine, thank you.”

“Great. Any questions for me?”

The videos of Gabriel having sex with other women make their way to the forefront of my mind. “When you drew my blood, did you test me for any STIs?”

She nods. “Yes. Everything came back negative.”

I exhale in relief, closing my eyes for a minute.

“Do you need any birth control or contraceptives?” Her tone is casual enough, but the insinuation is not lost on me.

My eyes pop open. “That’s illegal.” The Brotherhood doesn’t allow any form of contraception—at least for wives—since the goal of marital relations is always to get pregnant.

“Sex is not just for procreation, Mrs. Sinclair.”

My cheeks heat as the memory of the pleasure I brought myself last night—while thinking about a man who is undoubtedlynotmy husband—resurfaces. “Are you suggesting I’ve been unfaithful in my marriage?”

“Of course not, though I wouldn’t judge you if you were. I just want you to know I have those things should you need them.”

Before I can respond, Maverick returns with a pot full of steaming water, and V holds open the hot water bottle so he can pour it in. She wraps it in a towel and hands it to me, and the relief I feel when I hold it to my lower abdomen is heavenly.

Any animosity I felt toward her for suggesting I’ve cheated—or plan on cheating—disappears.“Thank you, doctor.”

“You’re welcome. Let me know if you need anything else.”

I ignore her offer, since I would have to be a terrible person to cheat on my husband. Even though I touched myself last night and didn’t think about Gabriel, that’s not the same as being unfaithful, right?

“You should rest today,” Maverick says, holding the door to the tent open for me.

“Where did you put the laundry?” I ask.

“Don’t worry about it.” He looks forward as we walk back to his tent.

“Maverick,” I warn.

He looks down at me and bats his eyelashes. “Yes, darlin’?”

When he called me that the first time, I hated it. Now, I can’t even bring myself to scowl. “It’s my fault they got dirty, so I should clean them.”

“It’s no one’sfault. And there are people who are happy to do it. Everyone helps out around here; not because they have to, but because they want to.” His words are clipped, like he’s slightly irritated with me.

“I doubt someonewantsto clean my blood-stained sheets,” I mutter.

We arrive back at his tent, effectively stopping our impending argument before it starts. I sit down on the bed—which has been made up with new sheets—and he crosses his arms and looks down at me. “Lie down.” His voice is gentle but authoritative. It fills me with something akin to exhilaration.

“Bossy,” I grumble.

Still slightly sweaty from chopping wood earlier, Maverick squats down and lays the blanket over me, careful not to actually make contact with my skin. “Comfortable?”

The genuine concern on his face makes my breath catch. I clear my throat and nod. “Yes. Thank you.”

He stands up and wipes his forehead with his bicep. “About last night…”

Oh shit, did he hear me? Does he know what I did?“What about it?”