Page 29 of Extra Grumpy
“No. It’s fine,” I say, forcing a smile. “Really. You should hang out with Wes.”
Because the last thing I would want to do is try to force something that isn’t there.
15
EMILY
“It’s a shame Rock couldn’t make it tonight,” my mom says as she finishes peeling a carrot. “We were looking forward to seeing him again. Do you think he’ll be able to make it next week, Emily?”
I concentrate on the onion I’m slicing. “I don’t know, Mom. I haven’t talked to him about it.”
“Well, please do, when you get a chance.” She glances over my shoulder. “Slice that a bit thinner, honey, if you can.”
I exhale a quiet breath and adjust the way I’m slicing the onion for the salad. As my mom and I finish prepping dinner, I don’t say much, supplying just enough conversation to keep my mom from suspecting anything’s wrong. But to be honest, I don’t want to be here right now.
When the three of us sit down at the dining table, I glance at the empty chair beside me and think about last week when Rock was sitting there. I’m not mad at him for not coming tonight—we never talked about him committing to multiple dinners, and I know that last time was a lot for him, even though he keptsaying it was fine. But I can’t help but wish that he was by my side anyway.
Even if it was just as a friend.
“Now, I know I’m getting ahead of myself,” my mom says, smiling brightly as we pass around the dishes, “but if you and Rock do get to this point, you do know that he’s welcome to use Grandma Lulu’s engagement ring, don’t you? It’s still safely stored away for you.”
I swallow hard. “Mom. Please.”
“Actually, I think I still have her veil, too, come to think of it.” My mom looks over at my dad. “We still have it, don’t we, Graham?”
“I think so,” my dad says.
My mom turns back to me. “Do you think you’d like to wear that, hon?”
I can’t take it anymore. I can’t lie anymore. It’s driving me crazy.
“Rock and I aren’t actually together,” I blurt out. “It was a lie. It was all fake.”
My parents stare at me in silence. The confusion on their faces is real.
“You kept pushing and pushing, Mom!” I say, my emotions high as they spill out. “You kept trying to set me up with guys, even after I told you I wasn’t interested. I was desperate. It felt like the only way I could get you to stop.”
My mom presses her lips together. “I see.”
“I guess we shouldn’t be shocked to hear this,” says my dad with a sigh.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I ask, my voice sharp.
“Well, Rock has a history of getting you involved in things,” my dad says.
I clench my jaw. “First of all, this wasn’t his idea. It wasmine. And second of all, what you just said isn’t even true. He doesn’t ‘get me involved in things.’ You just don’t like the choices I make that involve him. And it’s all because he doesn’t come from a family as well-off as ours.”
My mom clears her throat uncomfortably. My dad opens his mouth to argue with me, but struggles to make his point. Finally, he says, “What about the night of your senior prom, Emily? He dropped you off that night drunk and high.”
I groan. “I can’t believe you’re still bringing that up. That was so long ago, Dad! And like I’ve told you before,he didn’t have anything to do with it. It was all me. I don’t understand why you won’t believe that.”
“You didn’t do that kind of stuff,” my dad says. “You were a good student, a good—”
“You didn’t know everything about my life,” I snap. “Youwantedme to be perfect, but I wasn’t. The reality was that it was always hard for me to do well in school. I had to studysohard. I retook tests when I didn’t ace them. I played sports that I didn’t like just because you guys wanted me to play them.” Tears are rising into my eyes, but I don’t stop talking. “I wanted to make you guys proud. Istillwant to make you proud. But I’m tired of waiting for you to accept the fact that I’ve decided to live the life I want. I know you think my decision to run a bar with my best friend isn’t good enough, but guess what? I love it. I’m passionate about it. And I really, really wish you two could accept that.”
I think I’ve stunned my parents back into silence. I’ve never spoken to them like this—ever. It feels like such a relief to have finally gotten all of that off my chest.
My parents exchange a shocked look, letting the weight of my words sink in. Then my mom reaches out, slowly extending a hand. I let her take my hand and squeeze it. I quickly wipe my eyes and take a steadying breath.
