Page 145 of Yours to Keep
We follow the path down toward the beach.
The sand crunches beneath my shoes as the wind sharpens, salt thickening in the air. Adrian walks beside me, speaking softly now, like he is trying to convince himself more than me.
I stay silent, eyes on the water ahead, on the mountains cutting into the sky. There is a strange peace in it. Finn is safe. Deck will find him; he will take care of him.
And CJ…
My chest tightens. CJ will move on. He has to. He has to find someone who can love him the way he deserves. Just like Charlie loved him. Just like I did.
“You know I tried, Elijah,” Adrian whispers.
His voice cracks just enough to feel real. “I really did. I tried to give you everything. I tried to be everything you needed.” His words scrape against old wounds. His version of love was a cage, and I lived in it for years.
I watch him, unable to speak, my breath shallow as my heart pounds so violently I’m convinced even the devil standing in front of me can hear it.
He glances at me, waiting. Waiting for me to fix this, like I always used to.
“You still left.”
I swallow hard, and there it is, the blame.
“You don’t understand,” he continues, stepping closer. “You think you can just walk away and I’m supposed to be okay? You think I can watch you choose someone else after everything?”
His fingers tighten around the gun, and my eyes flick down for half a second.
He notices. Of course he does. The man standing in front of me still believes he owns the ending, that he owns this stage.
His voice drops lower. “What am I supposed to do with a world where you’re not mine?”
Fear settles deep in my chest then, because I finally understand. Adrian didn’t bring me here to say goodbye. He brought me here because he wants me to be the one who understands him when he does it. The one person who can stop him. The one person who never will.
I watch as he raises the gun.
“Kneel.”
The word lands like a command carved into bone.
I close my eyes and lower myself into the sand. It is colder than I expect, sharp against my skin. The wind wraps around me, but I barely feel it anymore.
My mind slips away from here.
CJ. My Sunshine.
I picture his smile. Hear his voice. The way he looks at me like I matter. Like I am wanted without conditions. I smile faintly at the memory of his dimple, the feel of his fingers in my hair, the warmth of him when everything else went quiet. I remember his scent.
He is mine.
And now I hope, I wish for him, he will find someone else who will love him just like I did.
My fingers sink into the sand one last time, letting it slip through them. A sliver of hope breaks through the fear.
I hope he comes.I hope he finds me.I hope he saves me.
Because I’m not ready to leave him. Not yet. Not ever.
“I love you,” I whisper into the wind.
The gunshot cracks through the air, and I hear someone scream.
