Page 14 of Bad Habit
“He told me it was his house…” Realizing now that it belonged to his mother makes my chest squeeze. That house is a link to the mother he never even met. God, and I basically attacked him in his bed in that house.
She nods her head a little before saying, “He bought it from Eddie a few years ago. All the guys got some kind of life insurance pay out when they turned twenty one. He used his portion to pay off the rest of the mortgage and buy the house. They haven’t lived there for a while but Eddie would never sell it to anyone but one of his sons. It was a very intense family dinner that night.” Her eyes turn a little glassy as if she is recalling the memory. It is still so mesmerizing watching how she perfectly fits into their family like she was always destined to be there. Just to watch how supportive and loving they all are to each other.
“It’s a beautiful home.” I think about how perfect the bones were and the way the air felt warmer. I lied that night. The house wasn’t creepy or cold at all. It was full of peace even though I’d never been there before.
“I’m sorry, I just can’t believe he brought you there. He doesn’t ever bring girls there. It’s like his sacred place.” That revelation weighs my chest down like I swallowed a handful of rocks. “And that’s where you guys…” I hate when she is in my head like this and doesn’t even know it.
“Had sex? Yeah, AJ. He took control of every inch of my body and then I blacked out from it. Literally. Woke up the next morning, and left before he even woke up. And we haven’t talked about it since.” I watch her process everything I just said and she just stares at me. I hate this part about her. She has this scary way of not letting her emotions play on her face. I’m not that lucky. I’m always showcasing every ounce of feeling I have. And I feel everything. All the time. It’s the most inconvenient and honest thing about me.
“Do you like him?” AJ’s voice is soft but strong. She’s protective of Oliver. But she also loves me. I can tell she is trying to be the best for both sides right now and I just wish I could tell how she is really feeling.
“I don’t know how to answer that.” That’s the most transparent answer I can give her right now. Because, of course I do. When his hands are on my body, I have a visceral reaction. But also, he doesn’t even date. I date too much. I love dates. I love having conversations with people. I love going out and doing things. Attraction to someone doesn’t equate to relationship compatibility.
“Does he like you?” I watch her closely as she asks the question. Her expression still doesn’t change.
“I don’t know.” I take a deep breath to try and steady myself. “We haven’t talked about it. At all. I shut him down any time he even makes a small comment about it. I don’t want it to be a big deal.” That’s the truth. It was the best sex I have ever had. But I know that going there will be messy. And two people can hook up and move on. It can happen. Even if those two people are very active in each other’s lives.
“Then we won’t make it a big deal.” And just like that, she makes everything feel normal again. AJ has always been able to do that. She doesn’t limit my emotions to just one thing. She lets me feel whatever I need to when I need to and is always just right by my side.
When I get home though I can’t stop thinking about the fact that Oliver never takes girls back to his home. Which then makes me think about all the things I would want to do to make the home more updated while keeping its beauty. Then I question if that would upset his mom if I make the suggestion but the way Eddie talks about her, she wouldn’t want that home to stay stagnant and in the past. Eddie once told me that she saw beauty in everything and was always ready to create more. And I’m constantly thinking about creating things. Our lives are too short and the world is too vast to not create. I find myself texting him before I even register in my brain that I'm doing it. He doesn’t know that I had the whole conversation about his mom with AJ and I want to keep it that way.
Mia
This could make your house less boring.
Oliver
Is this your way of telling me you made it home okay. Did Rory come and get you?
Mia
You’re supposed to be trying to be nice to him.
Oliver
I was nice to him at the party. Ask him.
Mia
What do you think of changing the living room wall to something like this? It would break the space up.
Oliver
You’re persistent.
Mia
Just trying to take my charity work seriously.
That’s you. You’re the charity case in case that wasn’t obvious.
Oliver
You did good today with training.
Mia
Don’t compliment me.It’s weird.
