Page 42 of Betraying Him
He trails the knife up my abdomen, applying just enough pressure to lightly cut into my skin. A maniacal grin paints his lips, and there’s something cold in his eyes. They’re black, empty. Dead.
He's the most terrifying thing I’ve ever seen in my life, and I give up with not fighting.
Fuck this. Fuck him andfuckmy dad.
If this is going to happen, then it’s going to happen with me fighting against this asshole.
“Stupid cunt,” he grunts as I try to kick him, but he makes three quick slashes over my chest and stomach, making me cry out in pain.
This can’t be happening. This isn’t real. Any moment now, I’ll wake up, and I’ll be?—
His hands grab my shoulders, and he forces me down to my knees. The pain of them hitting the ground is nothing compared to the cuts oozing blood from my body.
He kicks me in the stomach, and my body acts instinctively, bowing forward as the wind is knocked out of me. I wheeze, curling up into a fetal position.
Something happens to me then, something I’ve never experienced before, but something I’m grateful for. It’s like an out-of-body experience as I watch him continue to kick me while I lie there. He doesn’t slow down, he just keeps kicking and kicking. I can still feel his boot hitting me and the pain that follows, but it feels muted somehow.
He kneels down to look me in the eyes, as though he’s taking in every second of this moment so he doesn’t forget a moment of it and can relive it later, then his hands find my hair before he yanks me forward.
“I was hoping you’d put up more of a fuss since it’s so much more fun that way, but I guess Daddy was right. Youdojust lie there and take it. But there’s something in your eyes…” He tilts his head and gets even closer, so close I can almost taste the rancidity of his breath.
His knife is lying flat against the top of my head as his hand grips my hair, and I force my trembling arms to grab onto his. My hands find his, and I don’t know if I get lucky or if he’s distracted by the way he’s staring into my eyes, but I manage to take hold of the knife.
And that’s when I slam back into my body, coming to. I know I need to end this, so I force myself to move, even though my body screams in protest. It hurts. Fuck, it hurts so much, but I push the pain away and focus on survival. I slam the knife into his gut, and he doubles over, almost landing on top of me, but I heave myself to the side just in time before stabbing him again.
He falls to the floor beside me, both of us dripping with blood as his pain-filled cries drift away slowly, until I’m left with nothing but the silence of night and the reality of what’s just happened.
My consciousness dips in and out, pain and terror filling my veins as I shift until I’m leaning against the wall, and it’s only then, when I’m sure his chest is no longer moving, that I let the darkness finally pull me under.
THIRTY
HARLEY
I fakea smile as the others laugh and joke around me, not feeling any of it. My mind has been elsewhere since my interaction with Savannah last week, unable to forget the way she helped me through the cloud of panic that was stopping me from taking a breath. I’ve never had a panic attack before, and haven’t had one since, but I think everything just finally became too much, and my body had to release it somehow.
I spent my summer mostly alone, with Cole and Noah doing their thing with the girls and Logan off doing whatever the fuck it is he does, and unfortunately, it gave me too much time to stew. To think. To reminisce.
Seeing Savannah for the first time in so long felt like a shock to the system, and the pain of everything just felt too much. It felt like an overload of anger, resentment, want, need, and pain.
So much fucking pain.
Not only the pain of what she did, but the pain of knowing we could never be what we once were. Even if I could find it in myself to forgive her, she’ll never be able to forgive me.
Not after everything I’ve done.
I don’t thinkI’llever be able to forgive myself for the way I’ve treated her, so there’s no way she’d ever be able to.
She could have walked away and left me there when she saw what was going on, but she didn’t, because she is so much more of a better person than I am, and it doesn’t help that lately, I’ve barely gotten a moment of peace to prepare myself to see her.
You would think an entire summer would be enough, but it wasn’t, and now the only time I’m alone is when I’m in my room, and even then, I sometimes have someone barging in to ask me something.
Our group has changed in the last year, and our home is fuller than it has ever been.
Lana moved in first to keep her safe from someone who was after her, and Gracie moved in last week when we came back from summer vacation. To say I was shocked when I found out about Gracie and Noah being together is an understatement, but I don’t think anyone could have been as surprised as Cole.
Especially because of the way he found out…
So now, there are two couples in the house along with me and Logan. I’d like to say the both of us are sticking together, but he’s always been the type of guy to enjoy his own company. Which is why I’m currently trapped between two couples snuggling with each other while we watch a film, regretting my life choices, and wishing I had just opted to stay in my room.
