Page 122 of Bound Bride
My heart begins to race. Whatever decision Rose makes, I will respect. I love her too much to become the next nail in her coffin.
"I only did one project because I was halfway through writing this letter to myself, where I had to forgive myself for all the things I did, and all the things I was forced to do, and I realized that…" She finally stops pacing and faces me. "None of the things we did together made it onto the list. Even though I had the goal of becoming pregnant, everything we did was fun. I enjoyed teasing you in the pool. I enjoyed getting you worked up and sleeping with you. I enjoyed making you laugh and taking all these risks just to get attention from you because when I had it, nothing else mattered. So much of what happened between us was perfect, even with the filter of reality laid on top. And…"
Rose's lips purse and she slowly walks toward me.
"I realized that ever since I woke up, ever since you pulled away from me to give me space to breathe and unpack everything, I've missed you. I've missed holding your hand and waking up next to you. I've missed taking baths with you. I've missed listening to your work and having input. I've missed watching you smile, and basking in the way you look at me like it's the first time you've seen me in forever and you're grateful." Rose lifts one hand, freeing her fingers from her iron grip, and gently cradles my face. "Like now."
Her touch is soft and warm, sending a thrill of goosebumps down my neck and across my shoulders.
I swallow hard and gaze up at her, unable to speak in case my words ruin whatever Rose still wants to say.
"What I mean is… my love for you is real. I should have known that the moment I found out I was pregnant and I was terrified of hurting you. I'm sorry it took me this long to realize that what I feel is real, but it's all so obvious to me now. I loved our time together. I loved planning the parties and working with you. I loved the freedom you gave me and the fun we had. And most of all, I love how you make me want to be the best version of myself. So if… if you still love me, if you still feel the same, then I want to be with you. I want us to be a family; you, me, and the little tadpole in here."
Her free hand shifts over her stomach.
"If you still want m?—"
"Shut up." I surge upward, drawing Rose immediately into my arms and embracing her so tightly that her sentence trails off into a surprised squeak.
My mouth covers hers and I kiss her deeply, ending her long speech and melting into the sweet, familiar taste of her lips against mine.
Rose's hand slides from my cheek to my jaw, then it sweeps up into my hair, where she grips tightly and holds on.
Every fiber of my being sings out in utter delight to have her in my arms once again, and I will never, ever let her go.
"I love you," I murmur against her lips. "I love everything you are, everything you've been, and everything you're going to be."
Rose giggles softly and when we part for air, tears cling to her eyelashes. "You're not mad it took me weeks to figure this out?"
"Not at all," I assure her, lightly kissing her nose. "After everything you have been through, I would have waited months." I kiss her. "Years." Another kiss. "Decades." Another. "As long as it would take, even if in the end you decided you did not want to be with me. I would wait and love you as quietly as the moon loves the ocean."
Rose immediately bursts out laughing and her hand slides down to caress the nape of my neck. "You're so corny sometimes, you know that, right?"
"I do." Another kiss and then I pull back slightly. "Does this… this mean you are keeping the baby?"
Rose's smile turns shy and she lightly bites her lower lip as she nods. "I want to. Yeah. I feel like this little guy was a sign and I don't want to take it for granted. I'm kind of terrified about it but yeah… yeah, I want it."
My arms tighten around Rose as I lift her and spin her around to the sound of her delighted giggles, then my mouth closes overhers in a kiss so deep that my heart pounds up into my throat as if it's trying to give itself over to her.
I will do everything in my power to make sure the rest of our lives are as blissful as Rose deserves.
She will never be sad again.
39
ROSE
Six months later, everything's changed.
My smiling reflection gazes back at me from a full-length mirror, and I couldn't be happier.
A sun-kissed flush rests over the apples of my cheeks, dark mascara makes my eyes pop, and a loose, flowing white dress wraps around my body with enough firmness to be secure but enough stretch in the fabric that neither me nor my bump feels smothered by the lace.
Beyond the mirror, a gorgeous blue horizon kisses the edge of the ocean, and a handful of carefully chosen people make their way to the white seats lined up on the beach.
It's almost time.
The last time I stood like this, dressed in white with a man waiting for me at the altar, I was terrified.
