Page 70 of Hidden with a Rockstar
"You're not denying it," Sandy says, jumping with excitement. "She's here. She's definitely here."
"Sandy, enough," Jeremy says. "Let it be."
Sandy raises her hands in surrender, but she's grinning like she's already won. "Fine. But I'm going to figure it out." She points at me with her drink. "You can't hide forever."
Jo finds me at the drinks table. She's got her phone in her other hand.
"Guess what? The collab artist replied," Jo says. "Their manager sent through a draft contract. We have a meeting with them next week, want to come?"
"Of course. That’s great Jo, thanks for taking care of that."
"I should have listened to you before." Jo says.
I don’t say anything for a second, letting her words sink in.
"Thank you for taking care of the emails." I say.
"That was a start." Jo squeezes my shoulder. "But it was just a start. You carried a lot while I was somewhere else. You were carrying the band while I was checking out, and that's not how we're supposed to work."
"You were dealing with?—"
"I know what I was dealing with. But that's no excuse. I should have been there." She's quiet for a moment. Rebecca appears next to her, slides an arm around her waist. "But I'm here now."
"We're going to figure it out," I say.
"Yeah," Jo says. "We are. And you're not going to carry it alone anymore. That was my mistake."
She goes back to Rebecca, and I exhale, feeling a weight lift off my shoulders.
I stand at the drinks table with my wine and my band’s renewed partnership and my girlfriend across the room—still talking to Riley, still glowing, Riley leaning in to say something that tips Lena’s head back on a laugh.
Everything else in the room goes distant.
My hands are shaking.
I watch her laugh and she’s handing it to Riley Puth, and the jealousy that’s been simmering in me all night finally boils down into something clean and simple: I don’t want to stand here watching someone else get the visible, unhidden, out-loud version of Lena that I spent a year refusing to claim.
I want to be the one next to her.
Ana is still watching me. I can feel her presence beside me even though she's moved on to talking to Jeremy about something.
I can feel it in my chest—the decision crystallising.
I set down my glass.
It makes a soft sound against the counter.
I'm done hiding. I'm done managing. I'm done protecting myself by asking her to disappear.
She exists fully. She exists with Jani, with her friends, with people she cares about. She moved through the world without hiding. She loved openly. And I've been asking her to be invisible alongside me, which is not love. That's not what love is.
Love is walking across a room in front of everyone. Love is putting down the glass and deciding that visibility is worth the risk.
I watch Lena laugh, at whatever Riley just said.
I breathe. Then I start walking.
I can feel the room shifting. I can feel people noticing.
