Page 33 of Out for Blood
And Bram, Cassie… if you’re listening, if either or both of you are listening, I’m going to ask you to stop.
But then I’m going to tell you to be careful, because if you’re anything like us, I know telling you to stop will be pointless.
Whatever you decide, know we’ve never been prouder of anything than being your parents. We’ve taken this risk knowing it affects you too, and for that I’m sorry. I can only hope that one day you’ll understand that to look the other way — to stay silent — when anyone is abused is to become complicit in that abuse.
We aren’t built that way, but for your sakes, I wish we were.
We love you — so much — and wherever you are now, you’re not alone.
You never have been.
You never will be.
17
CASSIE
The tape recordershut off on its own, leaving a silence every bit as profound as the sound of my mother’s voice filling the room.
I didn’t realize tears were streaming down my face until Hawk pulled me into his arms and Jagger handed me a paper towel for my running nose.
They let me cry for a few minutes, the echo of my mother’s voice, somehow both familiar and foreign, ringing through my mind.
“You okay, mouse?” Vigo finally asked.
I nodded. “It just… it makes me miss her all over again. I thought I was used to be being without her, but her voice… it just makes her feel so close, and then I realize that she’s not close, that I’ll never hear her voice in person again, and I just get so fuckingsad.”
Jagger sat on the couch next to Hawk and me and took my hand. “That’s understandable. You’re allowed to be sad.”
“It’s been so long.” I sniffed. “They’ve been gone for over ten years.”
“Still allowed to be sad,” Jagger said. “There’s no moratorium on grief.”
“Crazy that she left this tape behind,” Vigo said.
“She knew,” I said. “She knew they were after her and dad. Knew Imperium Fratrum might catch up to them.”
Hawk rubbed at his jaw. He’d shaved off his hospital beard as soon as we’d gotten home but sometimes still seemed to be feeling for the scruff that had covered his face.
“It’s weird,” he said.
“What’s weird?” I asked.
“‘Long-stored treasures,’” Hawk murmured. “It’s just… weird.”
“Think it’s a message?” Jagger asked.
I rewound the tape, started it from the beginning, and let it play to the end, this time listening for anything that might point to a clue about Imperium Fratrum.
When I got to the part of my mom’s message that Hawk had mentioned, I rewound the tape again.
“… the information you need to pick up where we left off will require you to uncover long-stored treasures.”
I stopped the tape. “‘Long-stored treasures…’”
Vigo bounced his ball against the wall and caught it. “Maybe it’s about the key.”
I thought about the key that had been hidden with the recorder at the paper mill.“That doesn’t exactly narrow it down.”
