Page 81 of Duplicitous
His nostrils flare, and his entire body tenses, as though it’s taking all of his willpower to remain seated instead of reaching for me.
Even though it obviously pains him, he’s honoring my consent.
I soften towards him, but I don’t allow myself to close the distance between us.
“I just need to think, and I can’t be rational when I’m near you,” I say quietly.
He gives me a jerky nod. “I’ll never force myself on you. But know that I don’t need time to think. I don’t want to be rational. I just want you, and that’s it.”
I take another step back.
His jaw ticks, but he doesn’t move an inch.
“Will I see you again?” he grinds out. “Outside of class.”
My throat constricts, but I manage a nod.
“To protect you from your stalker,” he concludes bitterly.
“I want to see you,” I promise quietly. “I’m not just using you as a shield.”
He blows out a long breath, but he remains stiff. “Go, then. Text me when you’re ready to talk.”
My feet seem to drag across the carpet in heavy, reluctant steps, but I manage to walk out of his office.
I’m enamored with my professor, and I don’t know what to do about it.
20
KAROLINA
I’m exhausted the next day. Last night, I tried to write a steamy scene for my romantic fantasy novel, but the spice kept turning into angst. It didn’t provide the usual outlet I find in my creative work.
All I can think about is Rand.
He’d looked devastated when I pulled away.
I just want you, and that’s it.
My stomach flips at the memory of his fierce promise. I try to ignore the strange tugging sensation in my chest, but I know what it is: yearning.
I want this connection.
It terrifies me, but I want it anyway.
I’ve been alone for so long. The prospect of ending that loneliness is terribly tempting.
For years, my surface-level relationship with Bones has fulfilled me just enough to keep me in denial. I’ve pretended I’m not devastatingly lonely because at least I’ve had one person in my life who knows my real name. He knows my carnal secrets.
But he doesn’t trulyknow me.I haven’t let him.
And he’s never shared himself with me, either.
It’s time to end things with my masked man. I can’t just ghost him.
I owe him more than that.
I’ve been wandering through town in a daze, making sure to stick to the most well-trafficked areas. Following the shifting crowds of tourists, I make my way to York Minster.
