Page 29 of Bratva's Mercy
“And I have no say in that. Do I?”
“Right now? No.”
He shoved my hand away from his head. “Just as I didn’t have any say when you broke into my house before.”
I remained still, but my eyes flickered across his face. I’d left no clue of my comings and goings. Nik… Fucking hell. He’d blurted it out last night on speaker when I’d called him, but when Leo hadn’t reacted, I’d thought the concussion had worked in my favor and he hadn’t heard or understood the implication.
“You’re not going to deny it?” he asked.
“Why do you think I’ve been inside your home before?”
“When your friend said it earlier, I thought it was a joke.” He crushed the sheet between his fingers. “But you knew where everything was. My bedroom. My first aid kit. You even knew where to find my pajamas.”
Oh fuck. It wasn’t Nik then but me who’d messed up.
I’d been so worried about him that I hadn’t once consideredwhat my actions would reveal about the extreme lengths I’d gone to in order to find out everything I needed to know, and then some, about him. For a minute, I’d forgotten that Leo wasn’t like other men. He was too smart for his own good. He caught things other people would have missed.
I’ll have to be careful around him.
“When?” he asked. “And don’t lie to me.”
“A few times.”
“Oh. My. God.” He covered his face with his hands and drew in a deep breath. “Oh. My. God. This is insanity. I need to notify the police.”
“Don’t!” I grabbed his hands and pulled them gently away from his face. “You cannot get in touch with the police about any dealings to do with Morozov. Ever. Do you understand me?”
“You’re invading my home. The police?—”
“—are not your friend. Leo, whatever you do, you can never go to the police. Nobody’s going to hurt you. Don’t you get it? You’re safe with me, but the moment you call the cops, you won’t leave me with any choice.”
“But to do what? Kill me?”
I felt like I was being shredded from the inside as I debated whether to lie to him. As much as I had this unexplained, unhealthy obsession with this man, Maxim was still my boss. I’d been with him for over a decade, and I couldn’t throw that away for a man who hated my guts just because every time I looked at him, I wanted to sleep with him. Could I? Ah, fuck, no, I couldn’t.
“Have I hurt you since this whole thing started?” I asked, and when he refused to respond, I did it for him. “You know damn well I haven’t. I’ve been nothing but patient and kind to you. For fuck’s sake, Leo, it doesn’t take a genius to see what’s happening here.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I fucking…like you, okay?”
Fucking hell. I didn’t mean to come across like a six-year-old confessing my feelings for the boy hanging upside down on the jungle gym.
“What I mean to say is that this isn’t just about my work for Maxim. He doesn’t even suspect you of anything anymore. This is me making sure you’re hanging in there and not doing dumb shit like crashing your car.” I squeezed his hands. “Tell me that was an accident and you didn’t do it intentionally.”
“You think I tried to kill myself?” Leo cried too loudly, then grimaced.
“Hey, maybe we can talk about this some other time. You should get some more rest.”
“You expect me to fall back asleep after what you just said?” He jerked his hands away. “You killed my husband, stalk me every day, and now accuse me of attempting suicide. What exactly about that screams that you like me? I don’t have a clue what mind games you are playing, but you’re sick!”
“Maybe I am, but it doesn’t change the way I feel. Do you know I almost kissed you just now?”
He barked out a laugh. “Here? In the bed I shared with my husband?”
I couldn’t take it anymore. All the reminders that I’d killed his husband scraped across my nerves like broken glass. God, we already knew it—he knew it, I knew it—so why did he have to keep saying it out loud? He kept nailing the point into my skull that the history between us made me unsuitable for him.
Why couldn’t he be like Wren, who’d eventually forgiven Maxim for deceiving him? Maxim might have had to take Wren hostage before it happened, but I didn’t think I would win any favors with Leo if I did that. He was more mature than Wren. He should be able to reason that we had no choice.
