Page 12 of Timeless
“That was months ago, and you never thought to replace anything, like maybe buying at least a couch for the living room?”
“And you never thought to tell me you were living so close by?” His tone was sharp and defensive, and the sting of being blindsided was all too raw.
“Is this how it’s going to be?” I questioned, forcing my shoulders back, ignoring the deep ache in my chest that continued to build.
“Lily, I?—”
I shook my head and slipped out of his grasp, intent on collecting my hospital scrubs that I had left folded neatly on the counter in the bathroom.
“Are you leaving?”
“I think it’s best if I go to Arizona’s like I had originally planned.”
“Best for whom?”
“For . . . for both of us.” I forced a tiny smile across my lips.
“So you’re running again.” There was no masking the hurt in his tone.
“Sometimes, we make choices that shatter us; other times, others take those choices away.” Sadly, I’d known both sides of that coin all too well, and the guilt and shame that followed.
“Do you feel like you’re in that kind of position right now?”
I dropped my chin to my chest, trying so hard to stay strong, but lying to Jaxon was something I was never good at. Not that I ever had experience with it; he was just my person. The one I confided in and shared my thoughts, goals, and dreams with. He’d always been so in tune with my soul, often joking he knew me better than I knew myself.
Fast-forward to now, being in his home made me feel exposed and vulnerable. As much as I dreamed of seeing him again, I knew the onslaught of feelings would be unforgiving, and, truthfully, I deserved every ounce of his distrust.
“Lily?” My name was a question on the end of his tongue.
“Where are your handcuffs?” I asked.
His eyes widened in surprise, before darting toward the top of his dresser.
“Every inch of my being is telling me to leave right now, but truthfully . . . I don’t want to. I’m tired of running, especially when the brightest part of my past is standing in front of me.” I picked up the cuffs and extended my arm, letting them dangle between us. “I’m running on fumes, so while this will give you the assurance that I won’t run, it will also give me the comfort of knowing you won’t disappear on me either.”
“I can assure you, Lils,” he linked them over our wrists, tethering us together like two halves suddenly made whole. “I’m not going anywhere.”
With a nod of his chin, we climbed into bed facing each other with my right hand cuffed to his left, lying between us. Being next to Jaxon in his bed, close enough to touch him, was something I had dreamed about for a long time. It was surreal when, in reality, the last thing I should have been feeling was at peace. Not after everything I’d been through, but in his presence, against all reason, it felt like old times.
It was familiar and comforting, yet I knew it was also fleeting.
We were on borrowed time together.
My heart ached with the weighted truth, and as much as I wanted to bask in its glow, it would be foolish to surrender to the peace I was feeling. With my eyelids growing heavy, I rolled my body inward toward him until my back was flush with his chest. The motion brought our hands together, and he wasted no time threading his fingers through mine like old times when we’d spoon.
For one night, I could let myself rest and pretend like the outside world didn’t exist.
I was nearly asleep when I felt his lips ghost over the shell of my ear and whisper into the dark the answer to my question from earlier.
“I haven’t settled down because there was only ever one girl I wanted forever with.”
And that was when my first tear fell.
Chapter Four
Jaxon
Bang,bang,bang.
