Page 65 of Not Safe for Work
Is this really about him? Or are you just frustrated because you know your pitch is going to fail spectacularly?An unwelcome voice nagged at me.
Neil’s mouth twitched. ‘So youdofind me charming?’
‘I find you annoying.’
‘Annoyingly charming?’
I ignored him (and my traitorous voice of reason) and turned back to his laptop. The rain was beginning to get louder, drumming harder against the glass. A few stray droplets blew in through the open window and landed on my notebook, so I got up to shut it before it could do further damage. We didn’t have to step out of the room to know that the rest of the floor was basically racing to the elevator. No one wanted to stick around to see if HR would change their minds. No one but us, of course.
After a few minutes of working in silence, Neil slammed his hand on the table. ‘Can we at least take a coffee break? And maybe move to a less depressing room?’
‘Finally, a useful idea from you.’
He chuckled as we made our way out of the room. ‘As if you’ve been on fire.’
Can’t argue with that.
The pantry was deserted—a blessing, really, if not for the godawful smell of wet socks that lingered in the air. We filled our mugs and got out of there before it could do any permanent lung damage.
I ducked into the washroom as Neil took our coffees and went to find the best spot for our after-hours huddle. As I was splashing my face with water in a last-ditch attempt to jump-start my brain, my phone lit up on the counter with a message from my dad.
It was a photo of the yellow Vespa scooter I had emotionally blackmailed him into buying me in my first year of college back at home.
Pops: Urmisses U
I smiled at my reflection.You can just sayyoumiss me, dad.He rarely texted me. Mom was the one who called every day, without fail. Pops, on the other hand, had mastered the art of communicatingthroughher. He wasn’t a phone person, never had been. So, for him to come up with an excuse to text me, even a flimsy one, made my chest hurt.
Even after I replied with five emojis and two GIFs, the peculiar ache didn’t quite go away. It sank deep in my abdomen, a mix of homesickness and guilt rolled into a tight little knot. I tried to shrug it off as I walked past the row of glass-walled meeting rooms, each one dark and vacant now.Get it together, Kavya.This is not the time for an emotional meltdown.
It took me some time to find Neil. Lounging on the couch with his feet propped up on the coffee table, he was looking far too comfortable inside Rajat’s personal office.
‘What are you doing? We can’t be in here,’ I chided as soon as I pushed the door open.
‘Who cares? Everyone’s gone home.’ He gestured around him. ‘And I’m tired of sitting on those wonky chairs all day. My spine has earned this couch.’
I was too emotionally drained to argue. Accepting the coffee mug from him, I plonked down on the far end of the couch. I took a sip, watching the rain streaking across the window behind the wooden desk.
‘It’s coming down hard,’ Neil said, mostly to fill the silence.
I nodded, curling my hands around my mug. The warmth didn’t reach much farther than my palms. For a few minutes, neither of us said anything. The rain was loud enough to make small talk feel unnecessary anyway.
Then he turned slightly towards me. ‘You okay?’
‘Yeah. Why?’
‘You’ve gone quiet. Like, suspiciously quiet.’
I managed a weak smile. ‘Just taking a breather.’
He didn’t look convinced. ‘Something is up. I can tell.’
I sighed, mildly irritated at his refusal to let it go. ‘You won’t get it, Neil.’
‘Try me.’ His dark brown eyes were peering at me, the set of his eyebrows soft and encouraging.
‘It’s just …’ I exhaled, unsure how to articulate a feeling I didn’t fully understand. ‘Sometimes I wonder if all this is worth it.’
He didn’t ask me what I meant, just patiently waited for me to continue.
