Page 100 of Illegal Formation
“No,” Marcus agreed. “It’s not.”
He glanced between us, something hopeful returning to his expression.
“But he’s worth it,” he said, almost like a confession. “I’m willing to keep things quiet and take our time. For now. Until we’re both ready.”
“Thanks for sharing that with us,” I said. “And for trusting us with it. We’re here.”
“Always,” Darcy echoed.
“Love you both.” He kissed Darcy’s head and then turned to me with an arched brow. “And now, you can repay me by spilling all the dirt about Braden Lock.”
I barked out a laugh, picking my wine back up. “Okay, that’s a fair trade — but thishasto all stay here,” I said, making sure I connected eyes with both of them. “I mean it. We agreed we wouldn’t tell anyone, and if this leaks, it’s… well, it’s like you said, Marcus. I could lose my spot on the team, which would suck but wouldn’t be the end of the world, but he… he can’t lose his contract. He can’t have any negative press.” I swallowed, thinking of his sister, his family. “There’s too much at stake.”
Darcy blinked, her eyes wide with horror. “Okay, now you have to explain what the hell that means!”
I reached for another piece of cheese and an olive before I launched into my story, telling them about Braden, his family, how we’d had instant chemistry but he’d fought it so hard. I told them about the time he almost broke, about how he was there for me after the accident, and finally, about how we’d both given in.
Darcy was like a cartoon, her eyes wide and animated as she gasped and flew back down to the floor so she could lean into my every word. Marcus just listened with a knowing smirk — he was especially excited when I told him I’d convinced Braden to help me check off items on my bucket list.
“So, yeah,” I said when I’d caught them up. “That’s where it’s at. I mean, I convinced him thattechnicallyI’m not an active member of the squad… so that’s got to be a loophole, right?”
“Sure, right,” Marcus said, lips downturned as he winked conspiratorially. “Totally.”
“And even if it’s not, we’re keeping it a secret. No one will find out.” I paused. “Except you two.”
“Well, I’m all for you getting your kicks,” Marcus said, plucking a grape from the charcuterie tray. “Especially in a car with masks on, you kinky bitch.”
I bit my lip on a wicked grin. “It was so fucking hot.”
“What else have you done off the list?”
“Well, road head was an easy one after that. I just went down on him while he drove me home.”
Marcus laughed with delight. “He didn’t crash, so that’s good, I guess?”
“He came close,” I confessed. “Made me stop until we were off the highway. And then let’s see…” I tapped my chin, thinking about the last few weeks with Braden. Just letting him pop into my brain had my body buzzing to life, every cell in me yearning for him. I was ready to hop a plane to L.A. “There was sex in the kitchen, and sex in the shower, him letting me blindfold him…”
“You are truly living your best life,” Marcus said.
“I’m desperate for sixty-nine to be next,” I whispered, like someone might be listening in. “That man is amagicianwith his tongue.”
Marcus giggled in delight, tapping his glass to mine, and then we both turned to Darcy — who had been silent for far too long.
“Darc?” I asked, frowning. “You okay?”
She chewed the inside of her cheek. “I just… this worries me a little.”
“Me fucking a hot football player on the down low worries you?” I shook my head. “Babe, I promise — we’re being careful. No one will find out.”
“They could,” she argued. “And it’s not just that. It’s… well… the way you talk about him. How you two hang out a lot outside of having sex. Aren’t you worried you’ll… you know… catch feelings?”
And there it was — a dagger of truth to my heart.
I already am.
Those were the words I was tempted to say. I wanted so badly to confide in my best friends, to tell them the truth — that I already had feelings for Braden that were more than just sexual. How could I not be falling for him when I knew how big his heart was? When I saw how much he sacrificed for his friends, his family? When I texted him that I was alone and he raced over at record speed? When he held me as I cried? When he braided my fucking hair, for Christ’s sake?
“Nothing to be worried about,” I said instead, the lie shaking in my chest. “We’re friends, Darcy, that’s why we share so much and hang out. We just have fun together. But trust me — neither of us is under any disillusionment as to what this is or isn’t. We’re sneaking around, hooking up, having fun, and eventually we’ll just let it all go.”
