Page 68 of King of Ashes
Accepting that my instinct didn’t lead me astray, I smile, thinking I was searching for him. I was lost, but he makes me feel as if I’ve found my way back.
Overwhelmed by emotion, another flash pops into my mind.
“I’ll love you in this lifetime. I’ll search for you in death. I’ll find you through eternity.”
My head must be playing tricks on me. It has changed the blurry image of the man I loved into Vian, but it looks so real as I lie in his arms, both of us bare, gazing at him like I would die without him.Not okay, brain.
It’s a warm, cozy home dressed in greens, yellows, and browns. Pictures of us cover the wall leading upstairs, and through the French windows, I see sunrays playing hide-and-seek with the leaves of an impressive tree, its branches swaying in the wind as if dancing for us.
I remember the house from the other flashback. Only this time, it reveals more details.
So tired of not remembering everything, I cup my head, willing it to stop tormenting me.
I should be overjoyed that my brain released another memory, but how can I be when it keeps changing him, distorting the past until it becomes impossible to remember what objectively happened?
The door clicks shut behind me, and I jerk in the chair.
His face drains of color. “I would stab myself before I ever hurt you,” he says, despair lacing his words.
“I know, but I was deep in thought, and your arrival startled me,” I say softly, then stand and move toward him. I wrap my arms around his torso and bury my face in his chest. “You were magnificent.”
He stiffens and grips my chin to check the truth behind my words.
I smile with my entire heart on display, and he relaxes. “What troubles you then?”
“Nothing, just another memory.”
His muscles tense under my palm. “It’s the second one,” he whispers, sounding lost in thought.
“I can’t rely on them, but I have an appointment with another therapist next week. Maybe she can fix what’s broken.”
“You’re not broken. You’re perfect.” He kisses my forehead, and we stand in each other’s arms for long minutes.
I wish I were, but when I look into his eyes, I can’t feel anything other than perfect. “Take me home.”
As we walk out, he tells the guard at the door, “Send the video to everyone, including Lew.”
Back at the penthouse, fever runs through my veins. Whether it’s the night, his presence, my mind, or my heart, I don’t know, but the heat is unbearable, so I go to the terrace for fresh air.
I slip through the door and look out over Chicago from the highest point.
“Don’t run from me.”
“You don’t want me to run to you while I’m inebriated.” I finger-quote the word, rolling my eyes at him.
He chuckles. “Is my wife needy?”
I nod, biting my lip as he brushes his knuckles down my back. Goose bumps rise in his wake, the embers of desire flaring to life again.
I grip the glass railing, and he sets his foot between my thighs, spreading me.
“Did you change your mind?” I ask, my voice ending in a seductive rasp.
“No.”
“I could beg…”
“Be a good girl.” He grabs my ass cheek, and a moan flees my mouth.
