Page 57 of Tether
“Ren?” She stands there, frozen, staring at me in disbelief like she’s just seen a ghost. “Oh my God, Ren!” She rushestowards me, taking my hand in her palms, squeezing it tight like she doesn’t truly believe that I’m staring back at her. I point to a cup of water at my bedside. Mauve grabs it with haste, nearly spilling it all over me. The cool water feels like heaven travelling down my throat.
“Why hello, Margaret,” I rasp, giving her a weak smile.
She tries to return a smile, but it doesn’t come. She looks down at our hands and then to the floor. The tears begin to fall down her delicate skin, and I wish now more than ever that I had the energy to reach forward and wipe those tears away.
“I-I’m so sorry, Ren. Th-they did everything they could. Archie…” A sob tears from deep within her tiny frame, and my heart cracks a little more.
“Hey…Hey! Come here.” I gesture towards the side of my bed where she crawls in beside me.
“He didn’t make it, Ren. They did everything they could to help him; he just wasn’t strong enough.”
“Shhh, I know.” I stroke her arm with the little energy I am able to muster. We cling to each other in silence, grieving and holding on to the only thing we have left. Each other.
“You know?” Mauve asks, and I nod.
“Mhm. I know,” I tell her, fighting against my heavy eyelids. “I’ll tell you everything, Mauve,” I promise, right before my fatigued eyes close.
THREE DAYS LATER
“I’ve no more business to marry Edgar Linton than I have to be in heaven; and if the wicked man in there had not broughtHeathcliff so low, I shouldn’t have thought of it. It would degrade me to marry Heathcliff now.” Mauve’s soft voice stirs me from my slumber. Birds chirp softly outside, and sunlight bleeds through the hospital window, warming my skin. My eyes flutter open to the feel of the comforting presence of my friend. My tired eyes drift over the room and land on Mauve. Her purple hair is in its usual messy curls, wild and untamed like the soul inside of her. The sunlight dances over her tawny skin, illuminating her as if light itself is drawn to her beauty. The room is quiet, save for the soft hum of the monitors and Mauve’s melodic voice. She hasn’t noticed I’ve awoken yet, so I stay quiet, admiring her and enjoying the sound of her voice as she readsWuthering Heightsto me for the hundredth time since I’ve been admitted to the hospital. “So he shall never know how I love him,” she continues, “and that, not because he’s handsome, Nelly, but because he’s more myself than I am. Wh?—”
“Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same,” I finish the sentence for her, offering her a warm smile, imagining Loxen and his touch against my skin. Mauve glances over the book at me with a gasp, before tossing it into the seat next to her. Her excitement each time I wake from a nap tugs at my heart because I know there was a time when she thought I never would, and all I can think about is how I got so lucky to be gifted a best friend like her.
“Good morning, sunshine!” she exclaims, wrapping her arms tightly around me. Her sweet, yet citrusy scent engulfs me, and I brace myself for a sharp pain in my chest, the way I do with any contact, but it never comes. I guess that means I’m healing, and I know I should feel happy about that, but I don’t. The wound above my heart may be mending, but the organ within aches, like a phantom limb. The doctors say I’ll be okay to leave in a few days, and that I’m lucky to have survived an attack like that. When he told me, all I could manage was a nod. But the thing is, I wasn’t lucky at all. I am breathing, yes, but I’m only half alive.Mauve never told the doctors or police what happened that night. She’s been a loyal friend and deserves more than anyone to know the truth.
“Mauve?”
“Hm?” She releases her hold on me, eyes scanning my face with worry. “What is it?”
“Do you remember when I talked to you about Loxen Gray?” Mauve waggles her eyebrows and nods her head.
“The pompous ass?” she teases, and I laugh.
“The one and only.” I scooch over in the bed, and she makes herself comfortable next to me. Hours later, when all my secrets about the society, about Loxen, and every embarrassing secret I’ve had over the span of my life have been spilled, and the moon bathes Hollowcrest in its nightly glow, Mauve begins to nod off next to me. I rest my head against hers.
“Promise you’ll never leave me,” I say quietly into the night.
Mauve grumbles with her eyes closed, her breathing becoming heavy as she lulls to sleep. “Never,” is all she manages to mumble before allowing rest to claim her. I muster a smile, choosing to accept her promise as truth, if only for tonight. Tears run down my cheeks, and I allow them to fall. For my mom, for my grandfather, for Loxen, for Archie, and for Mauve, because one way or another, everyone always leaves.
Reed Sullivan slithers through my mind like the venomous snake he proved himself to be. Months upon months of lies, deceit, and manipulation at his hand and in the end, he walks away from it all unscathed and scot-free? I don’t fucking think so. I once promised that I’d never let a man make me feel small again, and when I return to Hollowcrest next semester, I intend to keep that promise.
THIRTY-SEVEN
LOXEN GRAY
They say that life beyond death is subject to the life that has been lived. I do not agree with this sentiment on the basis that if this were the case, I would not have been granted an afterlife of solitude and loneliness. For an entire year, I’ve roamed the manor grounds, occupying myself with the ongoings of the Gravenhurst Manor staff. Stuck in the in between, unseen by all those with a mortal beating heart. That is, until her.
Verena Gravenhurst captured my attention like a beautiful storm. Captivating to watch but absolutely lethal when necessary. Her sharp tongue and clever wit were not to be challenged by anyone who could not match her banter. I fell right into her orbit, transfixed by the simple way she would crinkle her nose when she’d get annoyed. I fell for her heart, but I fell even deeper for her soul.
There’s no explanation as to why she is the only living being that could cast her eyes upon my soul. Yet, there she was, stepping out of the town car, her deep blue eyes glaring through me like the dagger that stripped me of my life. Her likeness called tomine, and I knew from that very moment, I was eternally screwed.
Reed Sullivan ripped away a part of my heart once again by plunging the dagger through hers. I felt helpless, unable to save her, standing by with an absolute wrath that could flood an entire ocean. But then she came to me, and I felt the way her delicate flesh grazed upon my own. The softness of her lips and the feel of her breath as she whispered sweet nothings in my ear. I wanted to keep her. To bask in this glorious love for all of eternity. But alas, I could not.
Her return to the other side was inevitable. My little crow possesses a fire within her so fierce, she’s destined to unleash her fury upon those who have harmed the ones that she loves. To seek justice for those she has lost. So I can’t be selfish, as much as it breaks my own heart.
Almost two months have passed since I’ve been graced with the ability to marvel at her beauty. Two months have passed since I last heard the melody of her sweet laughter. My patience is thinning, and my agitation grows with every second that ticks by. I’m stuck here, within the confines of the manor grounds. Unable to leave and be by her side during a time so daunting. It’s enough to send me into complete madness.
Leaning against the gates of the garden, where Verena first captured my eye, I wait…and wait for what feels like an infinite amount of days. I light up a cigarette and watch the ash burn down to the bud with no intention to inhale this toxic release.
