Page 140 of Maladaptive

I nod once.

I shuffle into a sitting position, my hand still clinging to Conner’s. My fingers drag across his knuckles. My eyes drift away from Dr Kim toward the two people beside me. Mrs Jones smiles when she notices me looking at her. Conner is beside her, leaning forward, for I have a grip on his hand. His hazel eyes soften, making me blush before looking back at Dr Kim.

“Your name is Noya Dawn Taylor?” he asks.

I nod once.

“And your birth date is November twenty-second, two-thousand and three?”

I nod again.

“All right, let’s get to business.” He moves toward me, but then pauses. “If you’re uncomfortable with anyone in the room, perhaps they should leave now.”

Mrs Jones rises from her chair and says, “I will wait out here. I need to call Milo to tell him that Noya’s awake.”

Conner shuffles, but I have a firm grip on him. I turn to him and shake my head, hoping he knows I don’t want him to leave the room. I need him to stay put here… unless he needs to go to the bathroom.

“I’m staying,” Conner answers, squeezing my hand reassuringly.

When the doctor is over me, I release my grip on Conner’s hand. Dr Kim tells me he has to see how the swelling is going around my abdomen. Recalling Dad punching me there, I flinch and then nod.

I’m wearing the hospital gown, so when I lift it upwards and lie flat on my back, I can’t look at myself or Conner. However, as the doctor presses gently against my stomach, asking if there are sharp pains, I can sense Conner’s presence in the corner of my eye. His jaw clenches, and he flexes his hands, and those brilliant hazel eyes are so dilated that I can’t see any colour.

Dr Kim checks my temperature and pulse, and I wince when he changes the bandage around my nose.

“Your nose is broken. It will take about three weeks. Your bone cut through the nose on the right side. I had to close the cut with stitches and then realign your nose. After two weeks, you can take the splint off. You will have some difficulty breathing. Try not to touch your nose that much.” He leans away and writessomething on the paper attached to the clipboard. “I’m going to prescribe you pain medication that you will take twice a day for a week.” Dr Kim sighs while lowering the clipboard. “This is where I’d like to say that you’re free to leave after tomorrow morning. However, because of your circumstances, the police recommend that you stay for an extra night.”

I dart a look at Conner and then away.

“They’d like to talk to you sometime tomorrow.”

I bite my lip, and my hands tighten on the sheet covering my legs.

Conner’s hand touches my arm, and he squeezes reassuringly. My breaths slow, and I sink back into the bed. After a moment’s hesitation, I nod, agreeing.

Dr Kim smiles. “You’re a courageous girl, Noya.”

Courageous? I can’t find anything I’ve done that I would consider brave. I did things out of fear. And I think earlier today… I don’t even know what day it is… The day Mrs Crawford saved me was out of desperation and fear. I wanted to leave because I was afraid, not because I was brave. Nothing I’ve done was heroic. Mrs Crawford coming to my rescue is courageous.

I need to thank her.

Dr Kim leaves after a few more questions. I turn to Conner and point at his phone on the table beside him. He hands it to me, and I type.

Me: Where’s Mrs Crawford?

“She spoke to the police earlier today. Then she told me she would be back tomorrow to see how you were.” He reaches for my face but hesitates. I think it’s because of the nose. “Are you okay, baby?”

I smile.

Me: Yeah, I’m okay, Conner. My head hurts a little, though.

When did you get here?

“I was at home when you called my mum. I pulled up in front of your place as soon as the police arrived. When Mrs Crawford had you in her arms…” His eyes water, and he drags his shaky hand through his hair. “I was fucking scared, Noya. I thought… I thought.” Conner’s lip trembles, and tears slip down his cheeks. I can feel the sting behind my eyes seeing him this distraught.

I pull him towards me, and his head rests against my lap. I drag my hands through his hair while I lean back. Closing my eyes, I let Conner get all these emotions out. I know if our roles were reversed, I’d be so broken and emotional that there’s nothing I could do to prevent what happened.

My body drifts. The pillows, mattress, and sheets. They all swallow me until I can’t feel any more pain.