Page 60 of The Silent Bride
‘He must feel odd staying with his parents,’ Fran says. ‘Like he’s regressed back to his childhood days.’
‘I know,’ I reply. ‘Mum asked if I wanted to stay round at their place tonight, but that would have made me feel stranger than I do right now. I want things to feel as normal as possible, if that makes sense. Although, nothing about this evening feels normal,’ I admit.
‘You’re the first one of us to tie the knot,’ Francesca says. ‘It’s bound to feel weird. Apart from your sister of course.’
‘It all seems to have happened so quickly,’ Laurence says. ‘You and Seth only met a year ago.’
‘I guess when you know, you know,’ Daisy says, glancing at Martin who’s been very quiet this evening.
I hope those two are okay. They’ve been going through a bit of a rocky patch recently. I’ll have to arrange a proper catch-up with Daisy once I get back from my honeymoon.
‘I’m stuffed,’ Laurence says, patting his belly like it’s huge and not the six-pack he seems to have developed over the past couple of years. ‘Maybe we should make a move, Fran. Let Alice get an early night.’
I breathe in deeply, trying to settle my nerves. My fingers are actually trembling. I have this feeling like I’m on a very fast train that won’t slow down. It’s racing past all the stations so quickly that the signs blur.
‘Are you okay, Alice?’ Fran is gazing at me, her eyes full of concern.
‘Yeah, fine.’ I stretch my arms out in front of me. ‘I think I will get an early night. Although I don’t know how on earth I’m going to sleep.’
‘Alcohol?’ Daisy suggests waving the wine bottle at me.
‘I am not showing up to my wedding with a hangover.’
‘Fair enough.’ She grins and pours herself half a glass.
Everyone starts clearing the table, telling me I’m not allowed to help, that I have to sit and relax. But I wish they’d let me join in. I’m so jittery, I feel like I need to do something productive to calm down.
Once everything is cleaned and put away, I say my goodbyes to everyone except Daisy who’s staying here tonight. It’s funny to think that Martin will be moving in here. This will be their place instead of mine. I wonder how I’ll feel coming over to visit.
‘Everything okay?’ Daisy asks, returning to the lounge where I’m sitting on the sofa staring into space. ‘You’ve been quiet all evening.’
Tears sting my eyes. I manage to keep them at bay. But only just. I clear my throat. ‘I’m fine, just feeling a bit overwhelmed.’
‘Of course,’ she replies, coming to sit next to me. ‘As long as you’re overwhelmed and happy.’
‘I am,’ I say more decisively than I feel.
‘Good. It’s the end of an era, Alice. We’ve lived together for ...’ She frowns.
‘Nine years,’ I say.
‘Blimey.’
‘I know. It’ll be strange not calling you my flatmate any more,’ I say, leaning back against the sofa that won’t be my sofa for much longer.
‘Yep. We’ll just be run-of-the-mill friends instead,’ she says with a smile.
‘Never run-of-the-mill.’
‘And we’re both going to be living with boys. Can you believe it?’ Daisy’s eyes widen.
‘We must be mad,’ I reply.
Suddenly we dissolve into laughter that soon turns to tears – mainly mine. ‘Don’t let me cry,’ I say. ‘My face will be all blotchy tomorrow.’
‘Go and splash it with cold water, quick!’ Daisy instructs.
I hurry to the bathroom, half crying, half laughing and turn on the tap, cupping my hands under the stream of water and bringing it up to my face.
