Page 1 of The Wife
Prologue
The skin beneath my fingers is warm and soft. Pliant. She’s stopped yelling now, but I’m drowning in shock as she beats her fists against me. Kicks, scratches, tries to spit in my face. I can’t let go. Can’t let her ruin everything. Although I think it’s already too late for that.
Her scent catches in the back of my throat. I grit my teeth. The world has suddenly and violently shrunk down to just me and her. Nothing else matters. Sweat beads on my forehead and under my arms. I should stop this. Release my grip. I should let her come for me again and take the consequences. But I can’t. I daren’t.
I have too much to lose.
One
THEN
The first thing I notice is the funny taste in my mouth – metallic and earthy. Blood. I run my tongue over my teeth and wince, realising I must have bitten my tongue. The second thing I notice is the worried face of my fiancé peering down at me.
‘Toby,’ I croak.
He crouches and takes my hand and I realise he’s trembling. ‘Are… are you okay? You really gave us a scare.’ His face is whiter than bone, his neck red and mottled beneath a partially open shirt, his black tie pulled undone. ‘We were so worried.’
‘Where…?’ I try to sit up, but my brain feels as though it’s floating loose in my skull, so I give up and sink back down. It’s then that I realise I’m lying on the floor, my head on a cushion. ‘What happened?’
‘Don’t you remember?’ he asks.
I try to think, but my mind is fuzzy. ‘What’s going on? Why do I feel weird?’
‘You fainted, love.’ Toby’s mum Celia kneels by my side, one hand on my forehead, the other on my wrist. She looks different somehow. Maybe it’s her hair – she’s had it cut or styled or something. It looks straighter than usual, and browner. She must have had the grey coloured. ‘Looks like you came down a real cropper.’
I now see that as well as Celia, Toby’s dad Malcolm and his elder brother Nick are also in the room, staring down at me, deep worry etched across their brows. Nick and Malcolm are both wearing grey suits, which seems strange, and I notice how similar they look, with their square frames and brown eyes. Nick’s hair not quite as grey as his dad’s. Toby, on the other hand, is leaner, taller and more classically handsome, his hair a rich mahogany.
‘You feel a little clammy, but your pulse is steady. I think you’ll be okay.’ Celia is a nurse, so if she says I’m okay, I guess I must be okay.
‘I can’t remember what happened.’
Celia looks up at her eldest son. ‘Nick, can you get Zoe a glass of water?’
‘Uh, sure.’
I notice Toby’s right leg is quivering, and his hands are trembling. He’s not the sort to get anxious, so his concern for me makes me love him even more. ‘Toby, you’re shaking!’
‘I was so worried.’ He swallows and leans in to kiss my forehead. ‘If anything happened to you I don’t know what I’d do.’
‘I’m fine, silly. Just a bit dizzy, that’s all. Tell him I’m okay, Celia.’
Toby glances at his mother and she gives him a comforting smile. ‘Relax, Toby. Zoe’s going to be just fine.’ Celia sits back on her haunches. ‘Well, this is an unusual wedding day.’ She raises an eyebrow and squeezes my hand.
‘Wedding day?’ Only now do I remember. That explains Celia’s hair, the suits, and – I peer down at myself – my lace wedding dress. ‘Oh no! It’s today! Did I wreck it? Is it too late?’ This time I manage to sit up despite my woozy head. ‘I can’t believe I—’
‘It’s okay,’ Toby interrupts. ‘We’ve still got time. The ceremony isn’t due to start for another’ – he checks his watch – ‘forty minutes.’
‘What happened? You said I fainted, but I don’t remember that at all. It’s so hazy… I was getting ready and then…’
‘Like Mum said, you hit the deck.’ Toby shakes his head. ‘Are you sure you can’t remember anything about it? That’s quite worrying, Zo.’
I frown and try to recall what happened, but my brain hurts. Little stabbing pains flit across my scalp, coming to rest above my eyes, where they throb and pulse like flickering lights. ‘Last thing I remember, I was getting ready. Celia, you were here with Lou and Becky, helping me get into my dress. That’s it. That’s the very last thing I remember.’
Nick returns and hands me a glass of water.
‘Small sips,’ Celia instructs. ‘We left you to go get our make-up done at the spa. Then Nick came in to borrow a phone charger. It’s a good thing he was here, because that’s when you fainted, and he called me. I told the other two to stay there – didn’t want you getting crowded with too many people fussing. Looks like you hit the back of your head on the desk on your way down.’
I reach up to gingerly pat the back of my head and wince. Sure enough, I feel a pebble-like lump beneath my fingers.
