Page 24 of Riding Into Love
“River?”
“Yeah?”
“Will you do something for me?”
“Depends.”
“Look at me.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because if I look at you, you’ll kiss me. And if you kiss me, I’ll want more. And if we keep doing this, it’s just going to end in heartbreak. Again. I can’t do that again, Colby. I won’t.”
“You don’t know that.”
“But I do. Because that’s the way my life goes. I meet a guy, he sweeps me off my feet, and then next thing you know, my life is a fucking disaster, and I’m scrambling to pick up the pieces. Well, I can’t do it again. Not for you. Not for anyone.”
Colby doesn’t say anything.
“So, no, Colby. I won’t look at you, because if I do, I’m going to want to kiss you. And if I kiss you, there won’t be any turning back.”
“You’re scared.”
“Damn right, I’m scared. I’m fucking terrified.”
His jaw ticks against the side of my head. “You know I was married once, right?”
Now, I do look at him. I sit up so fast, my neck cracks. “You what? Why am I just hearing about this now?”
“I was twenty. We were together three years, and married for two. I thought she was the love of my life, and then one day, she met some rodeo star, and the next thing I knew, she was packing her shit and leaving.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
“Because the pain fades, and eventually, the only thing that hurts is the idea that you could’ve done things differently. I’ve been alone ever since, and it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”
“Maybe not, but at least you’re safe. You don’t have to worry about someone tearing out your heart and stomping all over it.”
“Or maybe the only way to be safe is to risk getting hurt again. Because if you don’t take the chance, you’ll spend the rest of your life wondering what might have been. Is that what you want? To live your whole life safe and miserable? Or do you want to take the chance and have a great love story? Your choice.”
I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. Because damn it, he’s right. But the risk is huge. If I fall in love with Colby and it ends badly... This is my last safe haven. I have nowhere else to run to next time.
“What if—”
Before I can finish the question, Colby kisses me. It’s gentle and tender. Like he’s trying to convince me with his mouth instead of his words. And damn it, it’s working.
My hands fist his shirt, and I tug him closer, needing to feel the heat of his skin against mine. His lips part, and his tongue swipes against mine. His kiss is intoxicating. His touch is consuming. And every inch of my body aches to be closer.
With one arm around my waist, he uses his other hand to tilt my head back. A moan snakes it way out of my lips, and everything in me wants to let go and get lost in him.
But I can’t. I’m not ready to hand myself over, even though my entire being is screaming for it.
Reluctantly, I pull away. Our breaths come out in heavy pants, and his hazel eyes are filled with so much heat, they could start a wildfire.
“I want to,” I tell him, cupping his cheek. “But I’m just...not ready, Colby.”
He lets out a slow, shaky breath. “It’s okay, darlin’. I’ll wait as long as it takes.”
