Page 99 of Secret Husband
He nodded again as the nurse led him into the kitchen. I turned to find Alexei standing behind me on the stairs, staring at me.
“He was glad he hadn’t met you before.”
“Because it means he hasn’t had time to forget me.”
“Yes. It will happen eventually, though. He will forget us all.” He descended a couple more steps until he was level with me. “But I didn’t forget you, Silver Eyes. And what happened in Vegas and what’s happening now tells me you didn’t forget either.”
This might have been true, but it didn’t give me any comfort. “No, I didn’t forget. And that’s what’ll keep me from repeating my mistakes.”
“Sorry, sorry.”
Gunnar stood on my stoop surrounded by paint cans, brushes, and equipment. He rubbed a hand through his beard.
“Is this what the kids call a walk of shame?”
“What? Oh, God, no! I was out getting coffee and ran into someone, and you know how it goes.” I picked up a paint can and shoved my key in the door. Gunnar had one of his own, so I assumed he had just arrived. “I completely lost track of time.”
I needed to shower off the scent of sex and Alexei, but first to get Gunnar set up in the living room. “Thanks for picking up the supplies. That’s so helpful.”
“Said I would. No Thad?”
As Thad had never once helped out, that was quite the loaded question. Also, given the way the gossip mill worked around here, it was more than loaded: it was cocked and ready.
“What have you heard?”
“Hatch told Jason who told Theo who told Elle who told Sadie. You know how it goes.”
I certainly did. And then I slept with my old crush-slash-husband. I knew exactly how it went.
“Thad and I are no more.” I filled him in on the basics. “I’m sure you’re thrilled about it.”
He eyed me from under one thick eyebrow. Man, those brows did a lot of heavy lifting.
“Sorry, I’m just a bit testy.”
“It’s okay. If he made you happy, then that was all I needed to hear.”
And if he didn’t … “Can you tell me why you didn’t like him?”
He rubbed his beard, thought a moment. I loved that about Gunnar. He took his time. “He didn’t help around here.”
“That’s it?”
“It’s enough.”
So Thad didn’t enjoy getting splinters in his hands or paint on his Ferragamo shoes. He had other qualities. Only, now I was hard pressed to name them. Neither was I interested in defending him after we were no longer together.
What I would really be defending was myself. My judgment of character. I had assumed I was good at that. It was the X factor I used in my business, whether it was deciding on which client to sign or advising which businesses with which they should collaborate. If my gut was so off, then what good was I to anyone, never mind myself?
This morning’s events just compounded my self-loathing. Bad decisions abounded, and here I was feeling as unmoored as ever. On the way back from Alexei’s, I had texted Thad to tell him we couldn’t meet, though I left out the fact I was too busy having sex with my husband. I had received no response—as if he knew I had already moved on.
I took a quick shower, hoping it would wash that man right out of my hair, but not a chance. Alexei was embedded under my skin yet again, though this time I wondered if I was feeling more tender toward him because of his personal situation. Nazarov Senior had seemed a little muddled, but not quite at the level of decline I expected. No doubt he had his good and bad days.
Gunnar was in the living room, opening a can of Berrington Blue from Farrow and Ball. After working in companionable silence for ten minutes, my brother-in-law turned to me.
“What about Nazarov?”
What about him, indeed. “I’m taking care of that.”
