Page 8 of Whatever It Takes
Me: Thank you. *kiss emoji*
After a few more glasses of wine and some well-needed girl talk, I finally decided to call it a night and get home to the girls.
I hissed,struggling to stand from the floor. My knee throbbed as I squeezed my eyes shut, regretting my stupid decision. A few weeks had passed since my injury, and I thought that I was healed enough to use the bathroom without needing my crutches, but I was sadly mistaken. As soon as my foot touched the bathroom floor, a pain shot through my knee, causing me to fall. The shock of the pain caused me to urinate on myself when my body hit the floor. I had to blink away the tears that threatened to fall. Once I pulled myself from the floor, I hopped towards the shower to turn it on. I grabbed a towel from the linen closet and tossed it on top of the small puddle of urine. I called Mariah’s name a few times for help, but never got a response, though I knew she was here. Her purse was still sitting on the nightstand, so she had to be upstairs where she couldn’t hear me. After carefully stripping out of my clothes, I climbed into the shower, taking a seat on the bench.
I tried to stop the tears, but I was so frustrated, I couldn’t. I buried my face in my head as I sobbed. I was used to doing everything on my own, but being injured was taking a toll on my mental health. Every day, I tried to hold it together, but falling today pushed me to my limit. My entire knee ached. I knew I shouldn’t have even been trying to move around without my crutches, but I thought I was okay. I couldn’t blame anyone but myself.
It took a while to get my emotions together. After calming myself down, I scrubbed my body. As I was exiting the shower, Mariah was walking into the bathroom. She stopped in her tracks, looking at the towel on the floor.
“Why is there a towel on the floor?” She asked. She was no longer dressed in her pajamas. She’d gone all the way into the master bedroom upstairs to get dressed for the day. I didn’t understand why, when all of her clothes were in the closet in this room.
“I fucking fell and pissed on myself. I called your name multiple times to help me up, but you couldn’t hear me.” I snapped.
“Well, there was no way I could help you up anyway. You’re so much bigger than me. And why would you pee on yourself, Saint? You’re too grown for that shit.” She said, scrunching her nose in disgust.
I wrapped my towel around my waist, hopping out of the bathroom, pushing past her. “Real shit, Mariah, get the fuck out my face before I disrespect you. How the fuck you supposed to be my girlfriend but barely been around to help me? Useless as fuck.”
“Okay, I understand you’re angry because you have to sit the season out, but you don’t have to take your anger out on me. I’m useless? But when you need something in the middle of thenight, who’s here to get it for you? You’re so fucking ungrateful.” She yelled, getting in my face.
“Bit-“ I caught myself before I called her out of her name. My mother didn’t raise a disrespectful nigga. “I ain’t even ‘bout to argue with you, bruh. You can bounce. On my life, I’m cool.” I carefully pulled a pair of boxers on before lathering my knee in the pain cream Blessing had given me. I strapped my knee brace on and pulled on a pair of sweat shorts and the matching shirt. Mariah was still here by the time I was finished getting dressed. She was seated on the edge of the bed, watching my every move. I knew she was trying to continue arguing, so instead of feeding into her bullshit, I ignored her stare, grabbed my phone, slid it into my pocket, and got onto my crutches, heading into the kitchen.
As I entered the kitchen, my mother was coming through the front door. “Good morning, Moo.” She greeted, placing a kiss on top of my head.
“Good morning, ma.” I dryly responded.
“What’s wrong?” She said, immediately noticing my sour mood. Before I could respond, Mariah walked into the kitchen.
“Your son called me out of my name, Miss Jackie. Could you please have a conversation with him about his attitude? He’s mad at me because he fell and pissed on himself.” She said, grabbing her keys from the counter. “I hope you have a better attitude when I return.” She turned to leave the kitchen. I heard the front door slam behind her.
“What the fuck happened this morning? You fell?” My mother asked, voice laced with concern. I sighed, explaining to her how I fell and why the argument occurred while she made my protein shake. “Saint.. that girl is no good for you. How could she be so selfish? I guarantee she heard you calling her name and chose to ignore you. I’m sorry you had to deal with that this morning.”
“It’s cool, ma. It’s nobody’s fault but my own. I shouldn’t have been moving around without the crutches. Blessing is going to trip about me being so careless.”
“Still, Mariah is your girlfriend. She should’ve been more understanding. Hurry up and finish your protein shake before Blessing gets here.”
“Slow down, Saint.” Blessing said, standing a few feet away from me with her arms folded across her chest. I swiped a bead of sweat from my forehead, ignoring her. I was on the balance board, trying to concentrate. “You’re putting all your weight on your right knee again.”
“I got it.” I gritted out, slightly wobbling as I attempted to shift my weight.
“Correct your for- “
Before she could finish her sentence, my left knee buckled. The board slipped, causing my body to hit the mat. “SHIT!” I roared.
She rushed towards me, kneeling beside me. “Don’t move.” She mumbled, shifting me on my back. I squeezed my eyes shut, gripping my knee brace.
“I’m straight,” I grumbled.
“You’re not, Saint. This is why you have to listen to me. Tell me where it hurts?”
I clenched my jaw, opening my eyes. “I just slipped, that’s all, Blessing. I’m straight.” I repeated.
“You could’ve torn something again. You scared the shit out of me. This is why you need to listen to me.” She repeated,placing her hand on my chest. I felt a slight tingle in my chest as soon as her hand touched it. She quickly pulled her hand away, like she felt it too.
“Look, I know you’re ready for this to be over so you can be back on the field, but you can’t rush this. You’ve been doing great. But if you keep thinking you can do more than you’re ready for, then you’ll hurt yourself again and lose everything you’ve worked so hard for. This is the second fall you had today. I’m begging you, Saint, please take it easy.”
“I’m not used to falling and not being able to get back up on my own,” I said, looking up at the ceiling, blinking away tears. Crying in the shower this morning was enough; I wasn’t about to break down in front of Blessing. Grown-ass men don’t cry this much.
“Then learn to. Do you think Rome didn’t fall several times? He always got back up and tried again. I warned you this wouldn’t be easy. I’m here to support you. You’re not alone. I know how tough this is. But I assure you, you’ll be fine,” she said. I felt her thumb gently wipe under my eye, clearing away the tear I was trying not to let fall.
