Page 23 of The Monster I Am
Spencer frowns, taken aback by my question after her little spiel. “Why did I save you?” She repeats. “Does it even matter?”
Yes. It matters to me.
Because as much as I’m trying to move on and forget about that night, I can’t. It’s fucked me up. We have so much bad blood and hatred between us, yet she still made a conscious decision to do it.
My own father can’t even speak to me, let alone stand to have me around. All he wants to do is ensure I know my place in his list of priorities. Someone whodoesn’t even like mechose my life over her own, and that has ruined everything I’ve ever known.
It doesn’t make sense. And in my world, everythingmustbe reasonably explained. It’s ripping me to shreds because I just can’t understand her way of thinking or the fact that she’s managed to turn my best friends against their beliefs.
And I hate that every single problem in my life right now comes back to the purple-haired woman in front of me. Yet, she’s not the cause of them. We are.
But she’s easier to blame. She’s easier to hate.
I need to fucking hate her.
It’s the only part of my life I can still control—that I can explain.
Except she’s making it fucking hard to hate her when she does stupid shit like save me or act the rational one out of the two of us.
And it makes me sick seeing her with my friends. They are meant to be on my side.
“No,” I finally answer, straightening up. “It doesn’t matter. I’m just surprised that you showed weakness. I thought you were better than that.”
Nice one, Hunter. You stupid dipshit.
Just as I try to convince myself not to feel bad for the comment, I see her brows start to furrow, a classic sign that I’ve succeeded in hitting her where it hurts. But it quickly vanishes a second later, a cold, blank expression staring back at me.
“Get out. Or do I need to call Rylan to come escort you?” she threatens darkly.
I force a dry laugh. “Put a sheet down if you do,” I say, stepping past her toward the door. “I would hate for this disgusting carpet to get ruined.”
Chapter seven
Bexley
Friday rolls around, and despite pushing myself this week, I’m finally beginning to feel a little better.
We agree with Willowbrook to proceed with our usual fight night. Normally, it would be a no-brainer, especially because of everything that’s happened the past few months being at Willowbrook. But this time, I had found myself hesitating when Tai asked the question.
Tension is high between both academies, everyone on edge since the second fire. Dean Lannister gave the official confirmation this week that our time at Willowbrook has been indefinitely extended until graduation, with the view—and hope—that when school returns after summer break, Cedar Heights can start fresh at their own setting.
It doesn’t help me or the other seniors, though. The thought of doing our final exams at Willowbrook sucks more than a Dyson, but we already suspected this would be the case.
I’m mindful of unintentionally adding to the growing worry, or shoving the stupid feud back into the forefront of everyone’sminds. But when Tai suggested I just view it as therapeutic means, I finally caved and said yes. After all, it would be a shame for the new cage to go to waste. It’s so pretty and deserving of attention.
I hang at the back of the crowd near the Cedar rooms, watching the cage over the mass of restless bodies. My legs ache too much to stand on the plastic barricade, and Lannister’s antics the other day proved that anyone bumping or touching the healing wounds is pure agony.
I have no idea what the hell that was about. I’m even more confused by the fact I haven’t told anyone about his impromptu visit. Not even Archie—and certainly not Rylan or Tai.
Lannister doesn’t deserve my pity by any means, but for the greater good of the situation, I decided it was best to just ignore it. If that asshole wants to have a nervous breakdown, be my guest. But he can do it on his own time—preferably as far away from me as possible.
Maybe I need to invest in a camera for the front door. I’d probably need a job for that, though.
Not that I haven’t been looking. The moment I was discharged from the hospital, I started applying again, but so far, I’ve been unsuccessful—that’s if anyone even bothers to respond at all. Seriously, just a quicknowould be appreciated. Edging is never fun unless it’s in the bedroom.
Speaking of which, my little game of hide and seek tonight seems to have caught the attention of the Kings of Willowbrook. They are doing their best to act indifferent, but every so often, Rylan and Tai keep randomly scanning their eyes over the Cedar Heights side. Only one guess needed as to who they are trying to find.
“How are you feeling, Bex?” Archie asks, making his way over to me.
