Page 37 of Beastly Mr. Buchanan
Fabio returns as though on queue to save his man.I’ve never appreciated his talent of bulldozing over awkward moments quite as much as I do now.
When Declan loosens his shoulders and finally accepts Matthew’s handshake—which remained available despite my boyfriend’s insult—I breathe a silent breath of relief.
A horrible thought grips me.I tighten my grip on Declan’s arm and demand his attention.
“Did you transfer schools and disappear because you thought I liked Matthew?”I asked.
“No, but it was a factor,” he growls.
“What other factors were there?”I prod.
When his features tighten, I realize I won’t get an answer to my question, so I shift the focus to Matthew and Fabio.
We sit and enjoy fancy sandwiches together.The air feels a little strained every now and then, but overall lunch turns into a pleasant ordeal.
Afterward, Declan ushers me into the passenger seat of his car before devouring my mouth in a searing kiss.When he pulls back, we both struggle to breathe from the intensity between us.
He insists I hold his hand as he drives us back to his apartment.I don’t argue even though the city traffic is terrifying, but when his phone nearly explodes from a flood of calls and texts, he sighs and releases my hand to answer.
Disappointment thrums through me, but I insist he drop me off and goes back to work to fix the crazy since they obviously need him.He scowls but doesn’t protest, relaying how dire the situation is.
I step into the room for the elevators, wait for the glass doors to close, then wave goodbye as he drives off.He returns my wave and holds eye contact with me as long as possible, but he’s already back on a call.
As I sigh and turn toward the elevators, another car pulls up.His grandmother climbs out of the backseat before her driver can make it around the car and waves him away with a scowl that highlights their family resemblance.
I stand like a kid with their hand caught in the candy jar as she approaches me.
Her expression doesn’t change when she notices me.She gestures me inside the elevator before joining me.I wait for her to choose her floor and debate whether I should pretend to be visiting someone else or not.
She points to the ceiling in the corner.A security camera videos the entire elevator.
“That thing sends me a notification every time someone selects our floor.There’s no point hiding now,” she says.
I swallow and adjust my grip on my bag.
“Are you corrupting my grandson?”she asks.
Uncertain how to respond, I shift my weight between my feet and search for an acceptable answer.
Ms.Murphy laughs and pats my shoulder.
“I’m teasing you, Karey.Welcome to the family.I’ll make sure he treats you right.”I nearly sob at her sweet generosity and understanding.I never expected to find a love of my own, so her kindness strikes deep into my heart.“At this rate, I might even be able to meet my first grandbaby before I die,” she says with true excitement.
All the blood drains from my head.I smile and nod like a puppet on a string, but my brain refuses to process my surroundings.
She wants great grandchildren.
Declan has never even attempted to use a condom before, and he’s never asked about contraceptives.He doesn’t know I’m on the pill.
I should explain to him why I’m on it and beg for forgiveness for deceiving him, but the thought of revealing my darkest secret fills me with indescribable terror.
He was going to eventually leave me again anyway.The moment he finds out I’m defective, he won’t want me anymore.Flaws and extra fat are fine, but destroying his future family plans is another matter entirely.
I can’t do this anymore.It one hundred percent makes me a coward, but my safest option is to say goodbye to Declan before he rejects me.I’d rather live alone with the thunderclouds of depression as I am now—with happy memories with the man I love—than to wait until he disowns me and shatters my protective illusion.
I offer to walk Ms.Murphy to her suite, but she shoos me away and disappears into her apartment.
My dread compounds with every step, but I cross the threshold of Declan’s suite and brace for the inevitable.
