Page 63 of Hung Up
“That’s the problem!” I say, raising my voice more than I mean to. “It’s not fair to him. I’ll never want this life and I can’t string him along into believing I do.”
“If that’s what you think is right. You know I’ll support you no matter what.”
I have no idea what is right. My feelings are all mixed up and I don’t know what to do.
“I’m going to pack. I can travel back to Montana with you tomorrow.”
“If that’s what you want, Sorrel,” she says softly.
By the look on her face, she thinks I’m making the wrong choice but I’ve made up my mind.
I pack my things and hide my suitcase in Charli’s truck. I’m happy she decided to drive instead of fly. She was visiting family here in Texas so it worked out perfectly when the tour landed inFort Worth. I hope Denton doesn’t think I was planning this all along. I won’t tell him I’m leaving until after the show. I know if I do it before it will ruin his night.
Tears prick my eyes and I swipe them away quickly. The sound of laughter and Denton’s voice, coming toward us. I plaster on my best smile, shaking away my anger.
“Hey, babe.”
I give Denton a quick peck and he gives me a confused look.
“Break a leg tonight or whatever they say,” I laugh nervously.
“What’s wrong, Sorrel?”
“Nothing!” I say quickly. “Everything's great. It looks like you got a great crowd tonight. I'm excited for you.”
Damn, I hate how he can sense something’s wrong. It’s like he’s studied my emotions and notices the slightest shift.
“Yeah…it’ll be a good time. You seen Emily? She left rehearsal early.”
“She’s in the back lounge I think.”
I’m annoyed he’s looking for her. Who cares where she is? I wish she’d go back to whatever bitch hole she crawled out of. Denton leaves to go find her and I join the others.
Charli has a cheesy grin on her face as her and Johnny banter back and forth relentlessly. They’re perfect for each other. I’m happy for her but sad for myself, dreading the conversation I know I’ll be having with Denton in the morning. I’ll do my best not to think about it tonight. My best friend is here and I want her to have a fun night in her old stomping grounds.
. . .
Charli and I hang out backstage with our new friends. the Lone Star Revival band who opened for Denton. The lead singer is a fiery redhead but she’s as sweet as can be. Her voice is rusticand sweet like honey all at the same time. She was amazing during her performance. She grew up on a ranch here in Fort Worth Texas so we have that in common and it’s nice to be able to talk with someone who gets it.
“So how long have you and Denton been together?”
“Oh, uh, a couple of months. We were friends before we started dating though. He basically forced me into a friendship with him when he showed up at my family’s ranch over the summer,” I joke.
“No way! That’s the cutest love story ever. He better write a song about it if he hasn’t already.”
I smile knowingly. I watch as her and Charli go to the bar to take shots. I’m not in the mood for partying anymore but I’m trying my best to rally. It’s probably best if one of us stays sober anyways. Someone's gotta be the responsible one of the group.
Denton is up now and we head over to the right wing. Johnny takes his spot and blows a kiss to Charli and she catches it and puts it to her lips. I shake my head and laugh at how cringy they are. Denton turns his head to me and gives me a tight smile. I try to give him one back but my heart hurts knowing I’m leaving.
I scan the backstage area looking for the harsh tour manager, but Emily is nowhere to be found. Now she isn’t even doing her job. Jake really needs to do a better job at checking credentials before hiring these people.
The concert is almost over and the energy is strange. The crowd doesn’t buzz with their usual electricity. Denton’s vibe is off and his heart isn’t in it tonight—it reflects in the crowd.
I know it’s not fair to the people who paid to watch him. Hopefully they understand that he’s a real human who has bad nights too. I think when people watch performers it’s like they almost forget we’re just like them. We have emotions and our feelings get hurt too. We’re not robots who were made toentertain people. But ultimately that settles it for me. I can’t be a distraction for him anymore.
27
DENTON
