Page 15 of A Perfect World
“I think you should go,” I said quietly.
He continued without acknowledging my feeble attempt to dismiss him. “I gave up Yale for you. I came here to be with you, take care ofyou.”
“I never asked-”
“You didn’t have to ask, youneedme,” he yelled, grabbing my arms. His fingers dug into my skin, my muscles, my bones. Too hard, his hands like metal clamps, nails pinching-
“You’re hurting me, please stop,” I choked, but his bulging black eyes bore into me with the same painful intensity as his hands. A strangled whimper broke through my lips. I tried to wrench free to no avail. Impossibly, his hands squeezed tighter and tighter until I cried out.
The front door of the dorm slammed as one of my roommates entered. Vince released me, the accusations in his face sewing my mouth shut.
Ashley paused in the hall. “Hey.” She waved innocently.
The words perched on my tongue.Help me. Save me.But no one would save me- no one had from my mother. No one would from Vince. I deserved it. I wasn’t worth the fight. My father had the right idea when he disappeared from my life. Had he stayed, I would’ve only gained one more person to let down.
I forced a smile at my roommate, blinking away burning tears. With the bedroom door no longer barred, I darted in, yanking it closed before Vince could follow. My heart thundered in my ears with the click of the lock.
“This isn’t over,” he growled through the door. “Wearen’t over.”
I didn’t know how long it took, but eventually he left. My legs gave out and silent screams scraped my throat, my trembling hands covering my mouth.
8
Ollie
Undertheshadeofan ancient oak tree, I laid on my back, sucking the end of a joint. The faint buzz didn’t do much for me. An ever present call for something stronger whispered in my ear. Unfortunately, Marty’s last batch of Percocet sold before I could steal them. He was due to re-up soon, but not soon enough.
“You’ve been avoidant,” Jack accused me two days ago.
I was a master of ghosting under normal circumstances, but I couldn’t easily avoid my only friend without him noticing. The reason for my reclusion?
Courtney.
If I was avoiding anyone, it washer. Maybe she overheard my name from someone, but I had a gut feeling that wasn’t the case. Combined with her shielding me? No, she had to know more. A deeper dive into her background didn’t garner much reassurance either. In a paranoid frenzy, I scoured the internet for the hospital groups in our area, finally stumbling upon some useful public records. It took hours to narrow down the hospital her mother was admitted to, and even longer to locate records of an infant Courtney born prematurely due to complications with a single note of IVF. What were the chances that she was part of the same trial program through Merit Institute like the twins? Like me?
My throat ached, my eyes ached, my tummy ached. My arm ached the most. Absently, I rubbed the scab under my long sleeve shirt. It was too hot for it, but I didn’t want mom to see the cigar burns he left- she’d start crying again and I hated her tears. They hurt more than fists or the belt. More than his words.
“Daddy said I’m not human,” I whispered, tentatively looking up at her. She approached me at the table where my dinner sat untouched, and brushed my hair out of my face. Her glassy eyes reflected so many sad thoughts as she blinked back tears.
“You’re very human, honey. Just special.”
I learned the truth at the ripe age of six by stealing it from Mom’s mind. I was concocted like a science experiment and even now, I questioned if I’d been modified to the point that I couldn’t be considered my parent’s son.
You aren’t natural. You shouldn’t exist.
I shuddered.
Did Courtney know her origins? If she was anything like me and the twins, who knew what kind of power she hid beneath that beautiful face. My thoughts ran on a loop, feeding spiraling panic attacks that sent me straight into the arms of narcotics and a manipulative empath.
But the concoction of drugs and Miranda’s potent high spurred endless fantasies. Usually, I was too intoxicated to fuck, so Miranda would curl into my side, run her fingers through my hair and attempt to kiss me. In those quiet moments, I was bombarded with unwanted images of long silvery hair tickling my bare chest and red lips grazing mine-
I needed something stronger to erase Courtney from my brain.
Dusting off my jeans and crushing the roach, I made the trek to class mildly high. The idea was to take the edge off, but it ended up giving me the idiotic idea to take a seat right next to her.
Something was wrong.
Dark shadows beneath puffy eyes, Courtney curled in on herself. She kept her head down, gnawing her chapped lower lip, pale cheeks glistening. She’d been crying.
