Page 10 of Laundering Down the Legions
Kearan glanced over, his amber eyes narrowing a fraction. "Just French toast with strawberries. I wanted something that would stick around."
Simple as that, he took a little of the embarrassment away. "Smells amazing. Family recipe, or something you made up?"
He flipped the bread in the skillet, eyes coming up to meet mine. "A little of both. It's all in the spices."
While we sat in that moment of soft comfort, Rhiot darted back through, snagged a water bottle, and tossed it over his shoulder. "Better hurry before Grayson drinks it all."
Grayson didn't look up from his phone. "Good luck. I've got a whole strategy session planned for this one. You'd have to fight me for it."
"I'm betting you both lose." Seph had dropped into a chair at the table, eyes still glued to her screen.
With every back-and-forth, the lightness tried to crawl back in, but there was tension underneath it too, something old pulling at my gut. Everybody was moving, and the room still felt frozen. Something in Kearan's face went soft around the edges when he looked at me. I wasn't going to be the one to break whatever this was.
"Spices, huh?" I leaned in a little more, trying to catch his eye without crowding him. "What's the secret?"
He tipped the spoon at me. "Isn't it obvious? You just throw in a little of whatever you're feeling that day."
I shot him a smirk. "That the secret to everything you do? Just throw in whatever feels right?"
He raised an eyebrow, amused now. "Most of the time. Keeps it interesting."
"You remember what we talked about the other day?" The words were out before I'd cleared them, surprising us both. Vague enough to give me an exit, close enough to see if he was anywhere near the same page.
Kearan nodded slow, reading my face. "A little."
"Not about making food." I bit back a laugh and wondered if all this fumbling was actually getting me anywhere, or if I wasjust laying the banter on thick enough that the two of us could circle the real thing forever without ever landing on it.
He turned back to the pot, stirring. "About the bonds?"
"Yeah." My fingers drummed the edge of the table, nerves keeping time. "Do you think...?"
My heart took off while I hunted for a way to ask the thing that had been terrifying me in a hundred different shapes. One of the two men needed to be ready. I'd set my hopes on Kearan. Maybe he was ready too. The thought that circled the back of my skull every time I got near him, waiting for me to give it a name.
But instead of stepping off that edge, I chickened out and aimed lower. "If the dish takes time to get where it needs to go, how long do you figure it takes to get us there?"
He met my eyes, and the warmth came back, turning all that pale a few shades brighter in the soft light. "Not as long as it feels, I hope."
I smiled at that, not sure if I was hoping he was right or if the hoping itself was the part that scared me.
Then Rhiot cut back through and the kitchen kicked up into noise again, loud and easy, pulling my awareness back into everything around us.
I took the plate Kearan handed me and sat at the table. Others served themselves, Kearan going last.
Everyone interacted like old friends. Verbal jabs here, physical ones there, with laughter all around. Someday, this would be my reality, just watching the team enjoy their life with me without the constant threat of death. Hopefully, no more demons though. I looked at my pet demon tattoos, noting Cerbie was sitting right on my chest while I felt the tingle of Mephistral moving along my back. How about we just reduced the number of malicious demons that dropped in? I could settle for that. Besides, I was quite fond of them.
I finished my plate, the satisfaction of fullness settling in deep. I was halfway to talking myself into seconds just for the distraction when Seph slid into the chair across from me, looking at me like she'd been watching me the whole time.
She tapped her fingers against the table, steady and insistent. "You're trying to read Kearan like he's a wall of ancient hieroglyphics. You know he's not a puzzle, right? He's just... Kearan."
The way she said his name poked at something in me. She was way too observant sometimes. I shook my head. "He's not the one I'm worried about. It's Ryker. The bond hasn't clicked yet, and the longer it drags, the more I feel him pulling away. And we're running out of time."
Seph leaned in, her whole face going serious, those big eyes lighting with purpose. "Ryker doesn't respond to explanations, Parker. He responds to being wanted."
"Being wanted? What does that even mean? I've thrown every card I've got on the table. I've literally confessed how I want him, just like I need the rest of you."
She rolled her eyes, and it came off soft instead of sharp. "That's the problem. Every time you explain at him. Here's why the bond failing wasn't your fault, here's what the future could look like. You're talking to him in a language he can't take in right now. You have to show him you want him, not lay out a case for it."
I opened my mouth, and the words died in my throat before they made it out. I hadn't thought about it like that. Every time I'd reached for him it had come out heavy-handed and panicky, nothing like an invitation to just be in the same room. "You really think it's that simple?"
