Page 72 of Freed By Fire
I don’t hear a word Doctor Shepard says as he continues his checkup.
Olivia hands me another cup of water, and I down it in one gulp.
When I blink, I’m being led back into the waiting room. Katia and Nadia are waiting alertly for us by the main door. In a daze,I follow Olivia to the car, and as soon as the door closes behind us, my hand moves to my stomach.
I press my hand against my stomach protectively.
“It’ll be okay,” Olivia says, without looking at me.
I look up from my stomach. “We have time before we go back, right?”
Olivia nods. “What do you need?”
“Can we drive past my parents’ house? And the diner?”
Olivia offers me a half smile. “That can be arranged.”
I lean back against the leather seats and close my eyes. I’m vaguely aware of hissing and whispering, and Katia’s voice, but I do my best to push it away. Olivia taps me on the shoulder sometime later, and I look out the window. The two-story Victorian seems the same, except for my mom’s red Prius parked in the driveway.
Olivia places a hand on my shoulder, and I realize I’m touching the window. I sit there, drinking it all in and imagining myself walking out the front door, my parents arm in arm ahead, and a toddler hurrying after me. When I press my face to the glass and blink, it’s not my parents I see, but Mason and me, with a little curly-haired boy between us.
When are you going to understand that you’re never going to have that? You gave up any semblance of normalcy the minute you decided to stay. Deciding to have the baby isn’t going to change that, and you know it.
The front door opens, and when my mother appears in the doorway, in her usual flowing skirt and blouse, my chest aches. She rummages through her purse to pull out the keys, and I’m overcome with the urge to jump out of the car and throw myself into her arms.
I want to hug my mom so badly that I start shaking.
Then the car starts moving, and I watch my mom until we round the corner, and she disappears. A heavy pit settles insideof me as we pull up to the diner a few blocks away. I gasp when I see a few cars parked outside the diner.
I can’t believe there are people inside.
Tears fill my eyes again as I deflate against the seat and chew on my lower lip.
All too soon, we’re pulling away again, and I’m leaving the diner behind.
The farther away we move, the worse I feel, until the sense of foreboding I’ve been trying to escape all day settles around me.
Too soon, the wrought-iron gates to the manor open, and I claw at my chest.
Olivia takes one hand while Katia takes the other, but I struggle against them. The back door opens, and Mason is waiting for me outside. I wrench free of their grasp and throw myself into his arms. He sweeps me into his embrace, and I place my head on his chest, over the steady beating of his heart.
He carries me up the stairs and to his room.
Mason sets me gently on the bed and hovers over me. He places a kiss on my forehead, and I wrap my arms around his neck. Wordlessly, he gets onto the bed with me and tucks me into his side. I throw my leg over him, close my eyes, and calm my erratic breathing.
I don’t know why I can’t breathe, or why it suddenly feels so real.
The violence and chaos of Mason’s world, the baby…
It’s all too much.
I don’t realize I’m shaking until Mason gets up to retrieve the blanket folded near the edge of the bed. Hastily, he unfolds it and pulls it over us, pausing to tuck the covers in. Then he lies down and pulls me against him. I’m still shivering when he strokes my hair and kisses the side of my face.
When the shaking stops, Mason slowly extracts himself from me and stands up. Through half-closed eyes, I watch him crossover to the door and say something. Then he steps out and leaves the door slightly ajar. Through the crack, I see Carlisle, his expression tight and cold. Then I spot Katia, but her expression reveals nothing.
Slowly, I sit up and draw my knees to my chest.
I lower my voice. “I won’t let anything happen to you. I know this isn’t how either of us wanted this, but we’ll figure it out.”
