Page 71 of Freed By Fire
Then, we’re being led through a set of doors and down a dimly lit blue hallway.
Doctor Shepard stops outside a door and pushes it open, revealing a white exam room with a bed in the center, a desk off to one side, and a few paintings hanging on the bare walls.Olivia tries to help me onto the exam table, but I shake my head. She and Doctor Shepard say something else, but I don’t pay attention.
I bury my head in my hands and wait.
The door opens again, and Doctor Shepard returns with a dark-haired nurse who’s wheeling a cart behind her. She stops and snaps on a pair of latex gloves. Then she straightens my legs and pushes me back, gently but firmly. I stare up at the ceiling, and my breath hitches in my throat as Doctor Shepard wheels a stool over to me.
Olivia comes to stand next to me and takes my hand in hers.
“Let’s just do a quick check before we get started.” Doctor Shepard snaps on a pair of gloves and reaches for the wand. He opens a drawer, pulls out a tube, and squeezes a generous amount onto my stomach. Then he moves the wand around, a furrow appearing between his brows. For a while, only silence and the sound of my heavy breathing fill the room.
Then I hear the heartbeat again, and I burst into tears.
I heave silently as I wrench my hand away and bury my face in my hands.
Olivia’s hand is on my back again, and she’s saying something into my ear, but I can’t make anything out.
All I can hear, over and over like a broken record on repeat, is my baby’s heartbeat.
It’s loud, undeniable, and real.
I feel someone’s hand on my arm, and I jerk up, drawing my knees up to my chest. “No. Let me go.”
“It’s just us,” Katia says. “Did he hurt you? What happened?”
Tears stream down my face as I shake my head.
“He was just doing a checkup,” Olivia says. “I don’t know if they’re allowed to give her a sedative.”
I glance between them and swallow. “I can’t do this.”
“London—”
“I can’t do this,” I repeat, louder now. “I know why I should, and I know it’s for the best, but I just can’t. I heard the heartbeat, and I… I can’t do it, Olivia. It’s my…it’sourbaby.”
A weight lifts as soon as the words leave my lips.
Just as quickly, I see the look on Katia’s face, and dread fills me again.
“Your baby will never be safe,” Katia tells me, stopping to block Olivia from my sight. “Think about that for a minute.”
I release my knees and stretch them out in front of me. “I know.”
Katia searches my face. “You better be damn sure of this, Blondie.”
I ignore the lurch in my chest. “I am.”
Olivia places a hand on Katia’s arm and waits for me to look at her. “We’ll do whatever you decide, London, but we don’t have a lot of time before we have to head back.”
I glance between them and inhale again.
On the count of five, I square my shoulders. “I’m keeping the baby.”
Katia mutters something and steps back.
Olivia throws her arms around me.
I don’t move for a minute, then slowly, finally, I relax against Olivia. She holds my hand in hers and doesn’t budge when the doctor returns, and there’s a flurry of activity around us. I spot the dark-haired nurse who wheels the cart out, the door shutting behind her with a finality that makes me want to hide.
