Page 46 of No Turning Back
I turn as I feel a pull on my jeans leg. I look down, and Mari is holding her arms up to me. With my heart in my throat, I lean down and pick her up while still holding Sydney with my other arm.
“Dada. Dada,” she says again.
My whole world is in my arms. No one is saying anything. Everything went silent when she called me Dada.
“How’s my little marshmallow?” I kiss her cheek as she clutches at me. “Come see what I got you.”
I let go of Sydney, who has her hand to her mouth and tears shining in her eyes. We never discussed what Mari would call me, but it feels right for her to call me that. I also know it’s a sound that most young kids make, but the fact she is sure it’s my title is perfect.
I set her in the car and make sure she’s secured as I push her across the yard, playing with her.
Seeing Mari struggle to keep her little eyes open, her plump little cheeks flushed under her tawny skin, showing how tired she is, brings a smile to my face. She is in Sydney’s arms as she talks to Autumn and Wrenn, who is holding her son.
“You can claim her publicly like that, but you better lock her down.” Jayden stands next to me with Aries.
“As soon as everyone is out of here, I’m going to have a talk with her.”
“What did Hawkeye come up with?” Aries asks, and I turn toward him.
“He didn’t have it yet. He said something came up. His guy Timothy is having to get their other hacker to do a search. Something about Sydney’s past being buried. Titan is having the same issue, but he identified the man from lunch. I don’t understand the connection yet. Cronus said he wants to check into some things too.”
“Well shit, that’s not good.”
“Nope. So, I don’t want to confront her yet. I want her to tell me.”
“She should be the one telling you about her past, not some hacker,” Jayden says, and I nod at him. “There is no going back now, that little girl has laid her claim on you.”
“I don’t want to go back. I only want them. I’ve always thought of Marinda as mine.”
As everyone starts to leave, my father says he’ll catch a ride with my brother, and I stand in the back, waiting until I can talk to her. She moves around the kitchen, cleaning up the little mess left from everyone.
“I know you’re waiting for me to say something.” Her voice quivers slightly. but she doesn’t turn around to face me.
“I’m waiting here for you.”
I can’t take this final step until she gives me something. Anything.
“I worked with a group of scientists, biologists, and cinematographers. We weren’t just coworkers. We were a family.”
Her voice is so quiet that I move to the other side of the bar to hear her. She still hasn’t turned around. I haven’t moved closer because I know if I get my hands on her, she won’t finish. She needs this space.
“I’d worked with them for a couple years. We wanted to go follow the elephants from Botswana and into Zimbabwe. I knew the danger. I’ve already told you about the Brigade and the Akashinga. I thought we would be safe. That nothing could touch us. God, I was so wrong. The Brigade slaughtered all of them. I should be dead. But I fought and made my way back over the border to get away from them. I spent months in the hospitals, so many surgeries. So much pain.”
I can’t take it anymore, and I round the island to get to her. I wrap my arms around her body as she cries.
“Baby, you’ve been to war too,” I say to her. “Tell me more. What about Mari’s father? Did he die that day too?”
“Yes, he died, but it wasn’t what I expected. He’d used me to get the coordinates for the trackers on the elephants. He worked for the Brigade.” Her head falls back against my chest. “When I found out he’d betrayed me, I was so angry. I didn’t love him. I had no clue yet he was a member of the Brigade. But I did find out he was married. He was angry with me. I called his wife and told her about us.” She huffs. “She proceeded to tell me she knew all about me. I didn’t know I was pregnant with Mari until right before the attack. I didn’t tell him about her before he died because I knew it would be another reason for him to kill me.”
“He tried to kill you?” I turn her around so I can see her eyes.
She tries to lower her gaze, but I tip up her chin so she has to look at me.
“He not only left me Mari to remember him by, but the scars on my side and shoulder as well.”
“Fuck.”
“Yep.” She doesn’t say anything else.
