Page 39 of The Duke on Her List
“But you need to prove it to yourself? Because this isn’t going to prove anything to anyone else,” he reminded her. “No one else will ever know it happened.”
“It will put something inside me at ease,” she said, lifting her chin. “That’s all. And I think that’s more than enough.”
“All right,” he agreed. “If it makes you happy, we’ll do it.”
He turned away from her for a moment.
“We don’t need any ceremony about it,” she said. “You can just…do it. And I’ll do my part, and then it will be done.”
He nodded.
“So…whenever you’re ready,” she urged.
He sighed. “It isn’t easy, you know,” he told her. “I’ve never done anything like this before. I’ve never eventhoughtabout doing this before. It was never an idea in my mind. And now I’msupposed to just stand here and say these words as if they mean nothing at all…”
“They do mean nothing at all. You know that. You know this isn’t going to change anything.”
He nodded again.
Suspicion crept into her voice. “I know I said you’d have to trust me, but…you do trust me, don’t you? Enough for this, at least? You don’t doubt the way I’m going to respond?”
“I don’t,” he assured her. “Not really.”
“Not really?”
“Of course I thought about that,” he said. “Because youcouldgive me any response at all, and then what would I do?”
“I’m not trying to trick you,” she said sharply. “I’d have thought you would know me well enough to know that I don’t wantthat.”
“I do know that,” he said. “It’s just that…this might be the only time I do this. I’m not afraid of how you’re going to respond. I think it’s that…I want to do it in a way I’m happy with.”
Her voice softened a little. “Oh,” she said. “I guess it’s going to be the only time for both of us.”
“Something like that.”
“That makes it…” She paused. “Notreal. It isn’t real. But…”
“But there’s something real about it,” he finished. “There’s something about it that matters.”
“Yes,” she murmured.
“You’ll forgive me for wanting to get this right,” he said. “For treating it like…something I care about.”
She bit her lip. “When I came over here, I thought it was going to be just…a game. You say your line. I say mine. Then it’s over, and we go our separate ways and never think about it again.”
“But I don’t think I will never think about it again,” Gabriel admitted. “I think I’ll always think about it. For the very reasons we just discussed.”
She frowned, her eyebrows coming together in worry. “Am I asking too much of you?”
“You’re not,” he said, and as he spoke the words, he knew that it was true. It wasn’t too much to ask. He had thought it might be. But now that they were here—now that they were in the moment and he was actually about to help her cross this item off her list—he realized that he wanted to do it.
Her list, she had told him, was all about giving herself experiences that she wouldn’t otherwise have had. Enriching her life and living it to the fullest. And for the first time, Gabriel understood that. Because the item they would check off the list today would be something he wouldn’t have experienced either. They would both enrich their lives…even though it was an experience he had never guessed he’d want.
He cleared his throat, feeling awkward and foolish—and yet, also, somehow sure of himself. This was what he needed to do.
He fell to one knee.
“What are you doing?” She took a step back and frowned.
