Page 24 of The Duke on Her List
Sure, you weren’t.She handed him a small stack of books. “Look through these. Give them to her, if you think they’re good choices. None of these books are the reason I became a spinster.”
“What is the reason?” he asked her.
“That’s forward of you.”
“You’re reading a scandalous book in my library,” the duke pointed out. “You’ve spend a night in my home. The whole ofLondon society believes that we’re engaged in a courtship. I think you and I are beyond the point of being too forward with one another. You don’t have to answer the question if you don’t want to, but don’t pretend it’s because you’re shocked that I had the audacity to ask it.”
Agnes laughed. “You’re right,” she agreed. “You did nothing wrong by asking. But as for the answer…I don’t know. What’s the reason you’re unmarried?”
He turned away slightly. “It never seemed like the right thing for me to do,” he said. “I never wanted to do it.”
“That’s really it?”
“That’s it.”
“And is it so hard to fathom that I might feel the same way?” she asked. “I know it isn’t common for a lady. But I’ve never wanted to marry. The idea doesn’t appeal to me in the least. It would mean handing over all my freedom to the whims of a husband, and I have no interest in doing that.”
“Your family. They don’t mind?”
“My parents might have forced the issue, but they’re no longer alive. My brother accepts my decision.”
“I see,” he said. “I’m sorry to hear about your parents.”
“Thank you. It was a long time ago.” She returned to her chair and picked up her book. “The good news is that I think I might be able to finish this book today.”
“Is that good news?” He frowned.
“Good news in that I won’t have to bother you anymore,” she said. “I know you’ve had enough of me hanging around your home.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“You didn’t have to.” She smiled, though she felt a little sad about what she was saying. “I know your focus has got to be on taking care of Helena, and I don’t expect any different. I know it’s a challenge for you to have me around the house, and that it’s a difficult thing to explain to her. We’ll finish our show of courtship, but I won’t need to keep coming around here.”
“That wasn’t the agreement,” he countered. “What about your list? We agreed that I was going to help you complete it, and so far, we’ve only worked on one list item.”
Heat rose into her cheeks.
The truth was that she’d spent some time thinking about the list and about his promise to help her with it, and she was no longer sure it was such a good idea. Every time she thought about the items on the list, she was embarrassed. They had all seemed like a good idea when she had been writing them out in the privacy ofher own home, but to share them with the duke? No, that was a step too far. It was more than she could stand.
“You don’t have to help me with the list,” she said. “That was always too much to ask of you. It’s enough that you let me read this book. We can be finished with that side of our arrangement.”
She’d intended to release him from his obligations, but he shook his head firmly. “No,” he said.
“No?”
“We had an agreement. I gave my word to you as a gentleman. That isn’t something I’m willing to go back on.”
“But I’m offering to let you go back on it,” she insisted. “I’m telling you that we can change our arrangement. In fact, I think it’s best if we do.”
He raised his eyebrows. “You don’t think I’d be able to help you?”
“That’s not what I mean.”
“What’s the next item on the list?”
She turned away from him.
His voice softened slightly. “I made a commitment to you,” he said. “I agreed that we were going to do this together. I’m going to stand by it. I’m not going to think any the less of you for this, whatever it is. You may as well just tell me.”
