Page 29 of Two Blessings For His Duchess
“I doubt highly that a novel about London assemblies will change my life,” he murmured, though the earnestness in her voice lingered uncomfortably in his mind.
Deciding he had reached his limit for self-reflection and literary critiques this afternoon, Nathaniel deliberately changed the subject. “Be that as it may, we must return to practical matters. I will let you know the exact details of the ball we will be attending shortly. The invitations arrived yesterday.”
Euphemia blinked, nodding her head. “In that case, I will need to go shopping. I need proper gowns for these occasions.”
“That is entirely fine,” Nathaniel said. “You may visit the modistes in town and get whatever you require.”
“All right,” she murmured. Then, she glanced over her shoulder toward the far side of the lawn, where Cordelia was currentlylaughing as the hound chased a stick. She turned back to Nathaniel, her expression softening. “Would you like to come and play with Cordelia for a few moments? You could throw the stick for the dog. I am certain she would love nothing more than for her father to join her.”
Nathaniel froze, looking at Euphemia. For a long moment, he genuinely considered it. He looked at the open space of the lawn, then at Euphemia’s encouraging smile, weighing the absolute absurdity of him running around in the grass with a hound.
Slowly, he stood up, brushing a few stray blades of grass from his trousers. He didn’t answer her directly, but he turned and began to walk across the lawn toward his daughter.
He knew Euphemia was watching him. He could feel her gaze resting firmly against his back as he crossed the distance, his stride long. When he reached Cordelia, the little girl’s face lit up with absolute, pure delight, throwing her arms around his waist before picking up the fallen branch to hand it to him.
Nathaniel took the stick and hurled it across the grass, watching the hound bound after it. As Cordelia cheered, a rare, genuine smile broke across his face, one that he couldn’t stop, no matter how hard he tried.
But deep down, beneath the warmth of the afternoon sun and his daughter’s laughter, a cold truth settled in his chest. Euphemia was right. He hadn’t had a proper childhood. He hadn’t had fun, or picnics, or freedom, and he knew precisely why.
Images of a cold, unyielding father, of endless hours locked in a suffocating study being drilled on his duties, and the crushing weight of an ancient title thrust upon his shoulders far too soon threatened to surface.
His childhood had not been a good one, it had been an isolated, demanding trial that had broken any sense of boyish joy out of him long before he had reached manhood.
Nathaniel deliberately buried those rising memories back into the dark corners of his mind where they belonged. He did not like to think about the reason why he was the way he was.
But as he threw the stick for the hound once more, listening to Cordelia’s bright giggles and Georgianna trying her very best to join in, he knew the truth. He had been raised to be a monument, not a child, and the cracks in the foundation were only now beginning to show.
CHAPTER NINE
“Ishould never have agreed to you and Leonora coming to London for the Season,” Seraphina declared, her fingers turning a bolt of sapphire silk with unnecessary force. “Not a single good thing has come of it.”
“You have recited that exact sentiment roughly half a million times for over a month, Seraphina,” Leonora retorted, not looking up from a tray of lace trimmings. “Do you have another verse to share? Or must we endure the paraphrase for the remainder of the afternoon? Because if you are simply looking for a phrase to repeat over and over again until your tongue falls out, I can suggest a few with far more rhythmic charm.”
Euphemia watched her sisters from the center of the modiste’s showroom, a sigh escaping her. She had been out shopping with them for over an hour to find dresses for her first ball as a married woman, but truly, she had simply needed to see them.
She was here, ostensibly, because she needed dresses. This was true. Nathaniel had announced, two days after the picnic, that Alistair and Yvette were hosting the first significant ball of the season and that they would be attending. Alistair Locke, the Duke of Pembourne, was one of Theodore’s friends, and his wife Yvette was someone Euphemia had known for the last season. It was, by any measure, a friendly crowd.
But this would be her formal entrance into the world as the Duchess of Greymoor, and the thought of facing the critical, razor-sharp judgment of thetonmade her stomach twist.
Seraphina’s mounting paranoia was doing very little to ease her anxieties. Ever since the hurried wedding, her eldest sister had settled into a state of permanent dread, viewing London as a predatory beast that had swallowed Euphemia whole.
“I am serious, Leo,” Seraphina hissed, lowering her voice as a shop assistant drifted toward the back room. She turned her sharp gaze to Euphemia. “Look at where we are. Euphemia is married to a man who treats his own estate like a fortress, and for what? A scandal that should never have happened. And you—” She pointed a finger at Leonora. “You have no intention of seeking a husband this Season either.”
Leonora’s expression tightened imperceptibly, her fingers stilled against the lace. “It doesn’t matter what my reasons are.”
“Oh, we all know about your grand reasons, Leo,” Seraphina retorted. “No matter how much you try to talk your way out of itor dress it up as something else, it is a foolish endeavor. I simply choose not to listen to your rationalizations anymore.”
“We all have reasons,” Euphemia said mildly, from her position in front of the glass. “That is rather Leonora’s point.”
Seraphina turned to her. “Don’t defend her.”
Leonora flared up, her cheeks flushing with a sudden, rare heat as she dropped the lace back onto the tray. “We all have our reasons, Seraphina! Every single one of us had a reason for agreeing to come to London, so why am I the only one enduring your cross-examination? Effie had her reasons, and look at her, she is fine, she is well, and she is standing right here with us. I have my own purpose for being in this city, and I admit it freely. Even if I do not care to speak of it because it is nobody’s business but my own, it is still my truth.”
Leonora turned her gaze directly to Seraphina. “But what of your reason, Seraphina? What could possibly be your own excuse for agreeing to come to London? Do not dare sit there and claim you only came along to be a good sister or to watch over us. We all know you are not entirely innocent in this. None of us are. You are hiding your own secrets beneath that scowl, so you have absolutely no right to judge me for wanting to keep my own counsel.”
The tension in the showroom grew thick enough to choke.
“Enough!” Euphemia stepped between them. “Stop this arguing. It is entirely unseemly, and we are in public.”
