Page 78 of Wolfkissed
She’s so close to me. She keeps coming way too close. Too close for the tenuous leash I have on my self-control when it comes to her.
She should be afraid. Afraid of me and my animalistic needs. I could bite her, enter her, tear her apart. There is a battle between affection and violent desire inside of me, a push and pull. A tug of war.
And she doesn’t even realize.
I’ve never been so fucked up before. Never been so close to a brink from which I fear there may be no return. No reclaiming of my sanity. Just having her here beside me, with her fear andpain and soft curves, the tumble of her shiny hair and those blue doe eyes, is remaking me.
Changing me into someone else.
I want to stay with her, keep her with me, be the one to always look after her, take care of her, soothe her fears, and claim her tears. Kiss her mouth and plough her body.
I want her to be mine. She is mine, even if she doesn’t know it, but what I’m quickly coming to realize is that I’m hers, too.
I belong to her.
Another thing she doesn’t know.
Better that way. I focus on building up the fire to avoid looking at her. I need to starve the desire riding me. She’s my distraction, and now I have to learn to block out my distraction. I have to relearn to be me.
It feels fucking impossible.
“How did they capture you?” she asks when I hand her some of the dried meat strips I saved—my pants have hidden pockets. First rule of campaign clothes: pockets.
“Hm?” I realize her collar is undone, and I’ve been staring at neck, a man starved for a meal. Then I gaze lower, at her breasts, the way her bodice cups and presents them like offerings, round peaches, the skin peeking through her neckline creamy and smooth. “What?”
“How did Lord Sinen and his men capture you? Seeing you fight… it doesn’t seem possible.”
“Thank you for the compliment,” I mutter, if it’s a compliment and not a commentary on my half-beastly form from earlier.
“So… how? Did they trick you? Did they trap you?”
“There is no bait I’d have taken,” I say. “Except for you.”
“Me?”
Damn, my mouth is loose again, spewing whatever is in my head. “A pretty girl. I’m partial to those.”
Unbelievably, her mouth quirks. “I see.”
I heave a breath. She doesn’t really see, can’t see how badly I want to haul her into my lap and bury my nose in her neck, draw in that sweet scent of hers.
“You still haven’t replied,” she points out. “I wasn’t there when you were caught.”
“Busted.” I shake my head and give her a rueful smile, poking at the fire with a twig. “You want to know how the fearsome wolf was taken without an attractive bait? True, I didn’t see you on the hunt. Stupid on their part, wasn’t it? Think of all the wolves they could have caught.”
“Ladies don’t go hunting.” She frowns at the flames and toys with the strip of meat I gave her. “Ladies stay indoors to read and embroider. Which I enjoy, but?—”
“But you’re bored.”
A slight shrug. “A little. Not that I’d want to go hunting. There are wolves who like to attack people. I’d have died from fright just from seeing one along the way.” She shoots me a quick, sideways glance. “Present company excluded.”
That strange warmth is back to take root inside my chest. Both that she excludes me from the creatures she’d hate to meet, and that she’s so honest. Opening up about her fear. Not pretending to be fearless, because maybe she’s starting to trust me.
So I reward that with a true reply. “I had been out asking about the whereabouts of the family who killed my mother, and your family name came up.”
“You knew my family name?”
I nod. “Your family was said to be in the know about what happened. I hadn’t realized just how involved.”
