Page 170 of Wolfkissed
My mother raised me in the ways of Cassia, the Goddess of the Blue Star, asleep now in the void with the other Gods, but sending dreams to her believers and leaving behind a code of life.
Patience. Calm. Readiness. Openness.
Open your mind,my mother would say,open your heart, Valen. Chance is a game, and only those who listen can hear the clues. Only those who observe will see the signs. Be ready to grab the bird flying by, the bee buzzing around you, or the person running past you. Grab them with both hands if you feel they were meant for you, that they are part of your path.
And my path led me to Rosie, right to her. The sign was as good as a blow over the head, and still, I left.
Kon growls at me, a reminder to get out of my head and keep running.
Darian headbutts my ass.
They are right. We’ll find her. There is no other option for me. She’s my life, and I need her.
CHAPTER SEVENTY
ROSAMUND
I’m running through the dark woods, bursting out into meadows where sheep graze. Lord Eorl’s animals. But I don’t think I can move any further. Despite the long trek I did with Valen, I’m not used to exercise, having spent most of my life in my room with my books and embroideries. I need to rest.
However, first, I need to hide, something Valen taught me. Lord Eorl’s people could come after me, so I need a hidey hole. I don’t know what spin he’ll give to my speech and departure. If he’ll find another way to get my estates.
Honestly, I don’t care. Let him have them. Valen makes me happy. All I want is him, if he’ll still have me. If his offer still stands.
The pain in my heart when I think of the contrary is like a knife wound, like the claws and teeth of the wolves who scarred me as a child. If he rejects me, now that I’ve realized how important he is to me, I feel as if it could kill me. Stop my heart. Push me back into my shell to cower. It almost makes me too scared to look for him.
But the days of shielding my eyes from the world and its realities are over. I’ll take the pain over inertia. I’d rather takemy chances than wonder to the end of my days about missed possibilities.
I only need to find him. Ask him.
See him, touch him, kiss him… I miss him more than I ever thought I would or could. I’ve missed him every hour of every day and night I haven’t been in his presence. I’ve longed for him.
The clues were there all along.
Across from the meadow, a hill rises with a hamlet growing on its side. I hurry toward it through the thorns and grasses that keep snagging my dress, glancing over my shoulder every few steps, certain I’ll see Eorl’s men coming after me.
The sheep lift their heads, masticating, watching me as I rush past them. A fox darts in the distance, a flash of red. Above, hawks circle.
The world is free. That’s how I long to be, together with Valen. I think of his face, his gaze, his hands on my waist, his voice. He dragged me out of my shell. Made me believe in people. In feelings. In a bright future.
“Valen,” I whisper. “Come to me. Where are you?”
But I don’t see or hear any wolves, and finally, I reach the hill. I start up the dirt road winding up the gentle slope, the wind blowing my hair in my face. I climb and climb, then stumble and crash in the dirt. A wordless scream tears out of my throat.
Please, Gods.I made a mistake. I let myself live in a fantasy for too long. Didn’t realize how wrong I was.
How important Valen is to me.
Panting, I push myself up to my feet and keep going. An old woman is coming down the road, carrying a basket in one hand. She stops at one of the huts and gestures at me.
“What are you looking for?” she calls out.
“A place to rest.”
Her gaze travels over me. “A noblewoman. What are you doing out here?”
“Hiding from a man,” I answer.
Her frown deepens the wrinkles on her forehead and around her deep-set eyes. “Then come inside, girl. No reason to linger in the cold wind. I have hot tea and a burning fire in the hearth. Warm you right up.”
