Page 58 of The Only Seconds that Matter
Johnny thrust a hand into the pocket of his coat and dropped the keys in the process.Victor snatched them up and tried a few until he found the right one.The door swung open, and Victor fumbled inside for the light switch.Once he found it, light filled the narrow hallway that served as the home’s foyer, illuminating the 70’s era wood paneling and a floor almost entirely covered in what could have been years’ worth of trash.
Victor nearly dropped the keys in shock, which was a good thing, because he might have lost them in the piles of beer cans, fast food wrappers, plastic bags, and unknown articles of clothing that so blocked the hallway that the narrow trail through it all offered the only glimpse of the original brown carpet color.
Victor decided to gape at it later.Johnny was still in a heap on the porch in the rain.Taking a fistful of his jacket, Victor led him through the door and into the hallway, where he knocked over a pile of detritus that clattered into the only available walking space.Now that Victor was inside and the door was shut behind him, the smell of trash and unwashed carpet was definitely stronger.Instead of commenting, Victor helped Johnny down the hallway toward the kitchen and living room, which looked no better than the hallway.The sink was barely accessible, and the stove not at all.At least half of the mess was beer and alcohol containers, all piled precariously on top of each other so that one touch would send it toppling.There was a bucket placed at the center of the kitchen floor, and right now it was overflowing with water.It seemed the roof was leaking, and someone had taped up a tarp to catch the worst of it.The trailer was in really rough shape, and in the dark and rain, Victor hadn’t noticed it in the glow of his headlights.It wasn’t as bad as what you’d see profiled on a season ofHoarders, but it definitely wasn’t a place anyone should have to live in.
“Johnny…” Victor began, otherwise speechless.
“You don’t gotta say nothin’,” Johnny muttered, red in the face and looking like he might pass out.“I know how it looks.”
“You’ve been living like this?”Victor asked.
“Obviously.”
“Your roof is leaking.”
“Yeah.”Johnny looked like a whipped dog at the moment, avoiding Victor’s eyes at all costs.
Victor looked around the living room.The couch was accessible, but behind it were a slew of beer bottles and cans, all tossed aside after consumption.Whatever coffee table existed was buried beneath towers of paper and old fast food containers.Thankfully Victor couldn’t see much rotted food, though there were more flies buzzing around the ceiling light than Victor had ever seen in a house.
Victor decided to look at the bedroom before depositing Johnny in it.This room looked the most lived in, as the bed was clear and the television was visible, but the closet was half empty because most of the clothing had been tossed wherever.There were tons of empty alcohol cans and bottles in here, too, and the trash can by the end table may have been filled to bursting more than a year ago, judging by how much it had overflowed.
Victor sucked in a few stale breaths, trying to control the flood of emotions that were now choking him.Maybe his instinct should have been disgust, but that was leagues behind the sucking sadness in his gut.No one should have to live like this.He wouldn’t let ananimallive like this.How long had it been like this?How long had Johnny been hiding it?.Learning that he’d come home to this filth to drink himself into a stupor made Victor sick to the stomach.Had anyone tried to help?Did anyone know?
Victor returned to the living room, but Johnny was gone.He heard him retching in the bathroom.Victor hesitated before entering, afraid of what he’d see.But beyond the usual trash, the bathroom looked functional, because when Victor stepped forward to flush the toilet, it worked.Everything needed a deep clean, sure, but it was good to know that Johnny hadn’t resorted to using the woods as a bathroom like Victor had seen in some cases on television.
Johnny sank back against the tub, expression dazed and body hunched.Victor bent down next to him and rested a hand on his arm, speaking gently even though he wanted to scream.
“Johnny…”
“I’m sorry,” Johnny whimpered, face buried in his arm.“I’m so sorry.”
“Sorry about what?”
“I didn’t want anyone to know it was this bad,” Johnny replied.“I know it’s bad.I know.You don’t gotta tell me.”
“Does anyone else know it’s like this?”
Johnny shook his head miserably.
Victor didn’t know what to say or do, only that he couldn’t leave Johnny here.Who knew what kind of roaches, mice, and spiders prowled the place.Whatever sickness that had consumed Johnny to make this feel acceptable to him, Victor now felt obligated to help him overcome it.All the bitterness he’d been biting back tonight vanished in an instant.
“Come on.”Victor slid an arm around Johnny’s shoulders.“Stand up.I’m taking you to my place.”
“I can’t…”
“Sure you can.One foot in front of the other.Come on.”
Johnny threw an arm around Victor, shoved his face into his neck, and started crying.Victor shifted to get in a more comfortable position and hugged Johnny fully, grasping him by the back of the neck and around the waist.He’d seen Johnny cry before, but now he wastrembling, and Victor knew this was about more than just the embarrassment of being discovered.
“Hey.”Victor pulled away a little, but he kept his hand on the back of Johnny’s neck.“Let’s talk about this tomorrow once you’ve sobered up.For now, let’s focus on getting you home.”
Johnny nodded miserably, and Victor helped him stand.Together, they staggered out the door and into the pouring rain.
* * *
Johnny slept in Victor’s spare bedroom, and Victor halfway expected him to run out before Victor woke.But Johnny had no car, so it wasn’t like there was anywhere he could go.Once Victor got dressed the next morning, he found Johnny on the porch, staring blankly ahead with the look of a man twice his age.Clearly he hadn’t gotten much sleep, and the hangover hadn’t done him any favors either.
“Well,” Victor began, hooking his hands on his belt and glancing toward the brightening clear sky.“Weather’s an improvement from last night.”
