Page 61 of The Only Seconds that Matter
“Johnny doesn’t?”
“Nah, he takes after his mama for the most part.”
“I’ve had to keep him from punching someone twice at this point.”He didn’t mention one of the people Johnny had tried to punch was Victor.
Sarah laughed.“Only two?Damn, he’s gone easy on you!”
Kayla’s nose was wrinkled as she climbed the steps.“What’s all this about?”
Sarah stepped back against the porch railing and gestured toward the front door.“Best take a look.”
Kayla marched past them and into the trailer.Seconds later, Victor heard her exclaimWhat thefuck!before she shouted Johnny’s name from inside.Johnny jolted before slinking his way toward them, shoulders practically by his ears.When he had joined them, Kayla emerged with pinched lips and narrowed eyes.
“What thefuckis all that?”she snapped.
“What you think it is?I don’t gotta explain it,” Johnny replied.
“You been living in that mess?What the hell is wrong with you?”
“Kayla—” Sarah began.
“You been criticizing my life choices for years and all the while you’ve been livin’ like this?You got some real fuckin’ nerve.”
“If all you’re gonna do is yell at me, you can fuckin’ leave,” Johnny snarled back.
Victor decided it was his job to step in before words were said that couldn’t be taken back.He placed himself in front of Johnny but faced his sister.“Listen, I know this is upsetting to see, but the important thing is that Johnny’s reached out for our help.This is all fixable.He asked you and Sarah to come because he needs your help cleaning the place out.”
“This was our parents’ place!And now it’s a fuckin pigsty.”
“It was messy before I got it,” Johnny said defensively.
“Mama was sick.She had a fuckin’ excuse.”
“And where were you?She needed your help.”
“Where wereyou?Oh that’s right, you were doing your own shit, glad to be rid of us all.How dare you try to makeanyof this my fault whenyouwere off fuckin’ around in rodeo.You didn’t even come to Mama’s funeral.”
“I was at the National Finals, there was areason—”
“Yeah, the reason bein’ money.Over your own mother.”
Johnny’s face had gone red, and Johnny shoved Victor aside so he could lean in close to his sister.“Who was it that bought this property for her?Who was it that supported both of you when you had three kids and a shitty job and Mama’s medical bills to pay?Don’t you tell me I didn’t do right by my family.I did what I could.”
“Yeah, you sent a check every four months, real nice of you.What I needed was for you to behere, not out chasin’ money and girls.”
“I can’t live my whole life for other people.I had to do what I had to do.”
“Ineeded you!”Kayla exclaimed, voice strained now.“I needed you when I was twelve years old and scared for my life, but you barely cared.You left me alone and you—” She cut herself off and whipped around, rubbing furiously at her eyes.“Fuck you, Johnny.I fuckin’ hate you sometimes.”
The anger and color had drained from Johnny’s face, replaced with regret.“Kayla… you know why I left.”
“Doesn’t mean I agree with it!”she blurted.“You were my big brother.You were supposed to protect me.”She wiped at her cheeks with both hands, sucking in shallow breaths as she struggled not to sob.“I had to deal with Daddy and Chuck and all that alone.You have no idea how—howterrified— And all because you wanted to ride rodeo!”She pressed her lips hard together and shook her head, crying now.“God fucking damnit.I can’t do this.”
At that, she threw herself forward, knocking Victor’s shoulder on her way down the porch steps.He was thinking Johnny might follow, but instead he stood rod straight and pale, Adams apple bobbing as he watched his sister run to her car and jump inside.Only when she’d skidded out of sight through the late fall foliage did Victor speak.
“Uh… so…” He cleared his throat.“That—uh.”What could he say, really?
Sarah put her hand on Johnny’s arm.“She’s just upset.She’ll come around.”
