Page 96 of Trial By Fire
"Bronwyn won't mind," Lindsey says. "And they do look good. Dani and I haven't eaten yet. Madi, are you hungry?"
"I am," Sully says around a handful of chips.
"Me, too. You up for it?" I ask Madi.
She shrugs and nods. "Yeah, sure."
"I know where we can go," Sully says.
"We're not taking my girls to the Pelican," I growl. "It's a bar."
"Hey, they've got food. And I need to check on something," Sully says.
"Don't you mean someone?" I counter.
Sully crumples the now-empty bag and tosses it toward the trash. "Fine. You guys go. I'm going to bow out."
"Tell Violet we said thank you."
Sully grins on his way across the room. "I plan to, along with a piece of my mind for not being more aware of who might be in her truck," he says in a dark tone. "Mads, glad you're back and okay. But do it again and you're going to have a long line of pseudodads grounding you until you're forty. Don't ever do that again."
Madi's safe. Mine. Here. For the first time in days, I should feel relief. But all I can think is that my family is still broken.
Chapter 41
Lindsey
We decide to order in and stay at Bronwyn's. After consuming one and a half pizzas, we settle in on the oversized couch and turn on a movie. The girls curl up on either side of Kace while I find a spot in the opposite corner.
Dani falls asleep almost immediately. Madi is next, looking much younger than her seventeen years. I can see such a difference in her from when I first saw her earlier, though. Her expression is less tense, and she's more relaxed overall, knowing her guardianship has been given over to Kace.
I can't imagine being a child, even a seventeen-year-old, being so okay with their only known parent giving them up. It's a testament to how chaotic Madi's home life has been as well as how safe Kace has made her feel.
I sense Kace's gaze on me. Locked on me with near physical intensity. But I avoid making eye contact and feign attention on the movie, though if asked, I don't even know the title or what's happening.
Long minutes tick by, and Kace extracts himself and gets up. He goes to the kitchen and stands there for a long moment before swinging himself toward the patio door.
"Outside," he whispers, motioning with his head for me to follow him.
My stomach knots. I know I have to face my faux pas from earlier. The only question is, how? What am I going to say that will make any of this better? That won't reveal the fact I'm that woman. The one who screwed up and got pregnant and yet finds myself here—in love with a man who is drowning in familial responsibilities and probably wants to run as far away from me as possible. I overstepped sending that text, and he undoubtedly feels trapped by my words.
I reluctantly follow him outside and take my time softly sliding the door closed so we won't wake the girls. When I turn around, I see that Kace has moved to the far end of the balcony to the lounger there.
My feet are encased in quicksand as I move toward him, and I am absurdly aware of his gaze roving over me as I approach. "Kace, if this is about today. What I said this morning…"
"It is."
I flinch at the news because I can't discern anything from his tone. Is he angry? Amused? Completely disinterested? I can't tell, and I hate not being able to read him. "I'm sorry. I was in a hurry because of Dani and concerned over Madi, and—I'm sorry."
"So you didn't mean it?"
And there it is. That question. "I…I…"
I look everywhere but at him because I can't face him. Not when I'm drowning in emotions. I know it's too soon. I know it's too fast, too sudden. I know the last thing that either of us needs is to add another complication to our lives, but when I needed a place to stay, he'd given me one. He'd given me so much more, too. A shoulder, a sounding board. Laughter and teasing and the best kiss of my entire life. He cared for me in my sickness when I was supposed to be taking care of him. He's shown up for me again and again. And it means the world to me. "You were so worried and upset, and—I do love you. All of you," I add in a rush. "How can I not?"
He inhales and draws back, straightening a bit as though I'd hit him.
"So you meant that as a friend?"
