Page 56 of Masters of Pleasure
“No… I mean… I don’t know.”She clenched her fists by her side.“It’s Ana’s birthday, and she wanted to come here—” She cut off as a cold, resigned laugh burst from Mitch’s lips.
“I didn’t even know it was Ana’s birthday.”He closed his eyes and shook his head.“This was a bad idea.”
“What was?”Hesitancy crept into her voice, but it was too late.
“This.”He opened his eyes, sweeping out his arm.Hell, he was never going to be able to come back to this restaurant without thinking about tonight.His favorite pasta place was going to be tainted forever.That’s what relationships did.They got people all hopeful, then they shit on everything, ruining it by association.“All of it.You, me.Probably everything.I didn’t even know it was your daughter’s birthday.I have no idea if you were ever going to tell her or your co-parents about me.I didn’t tell my dad about you.Maybe that’s for the best.Makes it easier.”
“Easier?”she repeated, staring up at him as though she didn’t understand what he was saying.Fuck.Was this what breaking up was like?This sucked even more than he’d ever thought it would.
But it was the right thing to do.
“I’m a bad bet, Domi, I always was.We should end this now, while our lives are still separate.Go back and celebrate your daughter’s birthday.You should be there with her, not over here with me.You weren’t even supposed to see me tonight, remember?”He whirled away from the shocked expression on her face, shoving his way into the men’s bathroom where she couldn’t follow.
At least, where she shouldn’t follow.There was a small part of him that worried she would, anyway.Another part that hoped she would.
Standing in front of one of the sinks, he stared at himself in the mirror, gripping the porcelain and waiting… but no petite firecracker came storming through the door to yell at him.Hell, he wasn’t even sure what he would say to her if she did.It really was better this way.
Wasn’t it?
Domi
In shock, feeling completely hollowed out on the inside as if she was an empty doll, moving through space because someone had wound her up and set her into motion, Domi turned away and started walking back to the table.The table she had sent the others to while she’d chased down Mitch.
She wished she hadn’t.
Except…
Was he right?Was it better this way?
Hell, if it was going to happen anyway, better sooner than later, right?
That’s why she’d broken off their arrangement in the first place.To end things before her emotions got involved.
Too late for that now.
She should have been angry, furious, but she couldn’t summon the emotion.She felt like someone had frozen her from the inside out.As she reached the table where her family was sitting, she also realized that wasn’t the worst thing in the world.She pasted a smile on her face for Ana and sat down.The other adults looked at her with worried expressions, Rae more so than the others.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, Mitch isn’t feeling well,” she heard herself say as though from a great distance as though someone else was using her mouth to speak.To smile.She was on autopilot.“Hopefully not something he ate.”
They all laughed, Ana a beat later than the others because she didn’t actually get the joke, but Rae still looked worried.Thankfully, Marcus and Julia seemed to accept her explanation at face value.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Mitch returning to his table, but he didn’t sit down.He leaned down and said something to his dad, giving the older man a quick hug, then walked out the front door.He didn’t look in her direction.Didn’t even glance.
The inside of her chest felt like it was starting to rip open.Her emotions were coming back into focus.
“Mommy?”Ana’s voice pushed them down again, leaving her once more in control.
Smiling, she looked down at her daughter.Her joy.Her constant.
“Yes, sweetie?”
“Can I have the ravioliandthe macaroni and cheese?”
“Sure, baby, it’s your birthday,” Domi said automatically.“You can have whatever you want.”
Ana should have whatever she wanted.One day, she wouldn’t be able to have something she wanted.One day, she would want something more than she’d ever wanted anything else in the world, but it wouldn’t be within her power to get it.It would have to be given… by someone else.That person might decide not to give it to her.They might run away at the first confrontation, leaving her bereft and hurting.
