My omega.Tonight might be the last night I can think of him that way.
My omega.I drop to the asphalt, and pain lances through my chest, worsening as I trudge inside.My omega.I pause just inside the door, leaning against the wall in the dark storeroom.My omega. A wave of agony steals my breath, my body tearing between instincts.
Fuck, I need another drink. But I can’t bring myself to put any more distance between us.
Light catches on dark glass, and I spy a box full of liquor, probably the tavern’s latest delivery. Not caring what kind, I grab the nearest bottle, pry off the lid, and drink.
CHAPTER
THIRTY-NINE
MYLO
I curlup on the roof, resting my head on my knees.
It took everything—everything—to not beg Christine to sink her teeth into my neck right then and there.
This is why I started suppressants; this is why I’ve made every choice in my life so deliberately—I don’t want hormones making choices for me.
Seems like my options are either that, or my hormones making me miserable.
Tears well in my eyes, and I take a deep breath. I just need to make it to the plane. Once I land in LA, it’s only a couple more hours to Joshua Tree. I’ll stay there as long as I need to. No alpha hormones, no Christine. Everything will go back to normal, and my suppressants will work again.
My suppressantshaveto work again.
What that doctor said…
She probably gets kickbacks for referring omegas to heat centers or something. I’ve been on suppressants for a decade,and it’s the first I’ve heard of suppressant rejection syndrome. It’s probably some made-up quack thing.
If I really, absolutely have to… I’ll go to a heat center. Better that than giving up my autonomy for the rest of my life.
That’s the worst thing about being an omega. Being so fucking vulnerable. Just because of the flip of a coin, just because I was born this way. Just because society is built for alphas. I can hate it, but there’s not much I can do about it. I thought I had the perfect plan. And it wasn’t enough.
Tears spill over my cheeks, but I keep my breath steady. I’ve made it this far, and I’m not going to give up on the home stretch. I just need a minute to reset—to sober up. Drinking tonight was a mistake.
There’s a scuff of a shoe on brick, then the quiet thud of a landing.
“Go away, Christine,” I groan. “I told you I wanted to be alone…”
“Hm, ‘Christine’…” The unfamiliar voice, deep and masculine, sends a bolt of pure adrenaline through me. “So that’s the alpha I should thank tonight…”
I whirl toward the silhouette of a broad male alpha.
He stalks across the roof toward me, scent hidden downwind.
I scramble backwards, panicking. I should scream, yell for help, flee, brace, but I can’t get my body to work.
“I thought for sure she was going to claim you.” The alpha gives a cruel, cold chuckle. “Weakling. Female alphas always are. They don’t have the stomach to do what ought to be done… Hm. Her loss, my gain.”
I back into the metal wall of an air conditioning unit and the alpha reaches me, gripping the silk of my dress to pull me to my feet. He takes a deep breath, then runs his tongue up my cheek and face.
“Aren’t you justdelicious…”
I should kick, fight, run. I’ve practiced every maneuver a thousand times. But my body is frozen, far away.
I’m trapped in a memory.
Twenty years ago
