Page 37 of Practically Perfect
“How many… How many are there?”
“Twelve dozen,” he replies, handing me the vase. “You must have a wonderful man to send you this many flowers. Be right back with more.” He turns and starts walking back to his delivery van.
What. The. Actual. Fuck.
Twelve dozen. That’s… That’s a hundred and forty-four carnations.
I stand frozen inside the partially open door as the deliveryman continues to place bouquets of red carnations on my front porch. A small part of me wants to believe Brian sent this enormous display of flowers as a prelude to our engagement party this weekend. The growing pit in my stomach knows the truth.
He’s not coming.
Numb, I bring in all the flowers, filling almost every empty table space in the living room. If anyone else walked in, they’d assume it’s set up for a proposal, not a likely pre-emptive apology from my fiancé who can’t attendourengagement party.
It’s the middle of the afternoon, so talking to Brian isn’t an option. There’s no way he would tolerate the type of conversation we need to have while he’s at work. I can’t fathom telling Jake; it’ll confirm all his suspicions. That leaves Chelsi.
I snap a quick picture of the ridiculous display of flowers blanketing my living room and send it to Chelsi without any context, hoping to garner her unbiased reaction before sharing my fear. Tears well in my eyes as I worry about what this gesture means and how I’ll explain his absence at the party if it turns out I’m right.
Chelsi
Why are there red carnations covering your living room?
Kate
Your guess is as good as mine.
Chelsi
Hmmm…conflicting thoughts. Need more details. How many? What does the card say?
Kate
Twelve dozen. Generic card says, “I love you.”
Chelsi
He’s being incredibly sweet and sending you an obscene number of flowers before your engagement party or…
Kate
Or what?
Chelsi
I’m going to fucking kill him.
Kate
???
Chelsi
Because he’s obviously done something horrible and thinks he can apologize with shitty flowers. Haven’t you told him that you hate red carnations?
Kate
Yes, many times.
Chelsi
