Page 32 of On Silver Winds
If Mareda learned of their cosy private lunches, Adeline wasn’t sure what she could say to make her sister understand. She wasn’t sure she understood herself, truth be told. And until she did understand, Mareda could not find out.
If she did, Adeline knew with aching clarity, something would come undone between them.
???
It was difficult for Adeline to reconcile the feverish waif she tended to each day with the formidable Queen she’d hidden from throughout her youth.
Mareda clung to distant memories of a warm and playful mother, from a time when Queen Selma was as delightful behind closed doors as she was in the open court; a time before the weight of the crown took its toll. So while Adeline learned quite easily to steer clear of their matriarch, Mareda could only cling closer, work harder to win her approval.
But this version of Selma was not the same vaguely disdainful woman they had grown to know. The sickly Queenlistenedto Adeline, asked her questions about herself and her life in the palace, watched her with genuine, almost impatient interest. She came to understand that her mother was trying to get to know her; to make up for lost time.
When she was too tired to needle Adeline with questions, the Queen listened instead to the few stories her daughter picked up around the palace – the cleaned up versions, anyway. But day by day, Adeline found there were fewer wild tales to edit as the collective focus narrowed to just one grave concern.
“They say Eisalaan is thawing,” said Adeline one lunchtime, as she drew a chair to her mother’s bedside.
The Queen gave her a sharp look, and shuffled higher amongst her bank of pillows. “Nonsense. Where in the world would anyone get that idea?”
“The Laune is layered in slush, mother. Something isn’t right, and people are scared.”
Her mother closed her eyes and was still for so long that Adeline began to think she had fallen asleep; but when she blinked again, her eyes were bright and focused. “What does your sister say?”
Adeline gave an equivocal mutter.
“Mareda has still been holding court in the mornings, has she not?”
“Yes. But I don’t know what she makes of the Thaw –”
“The Thaw,” the Queen chuckled weakly. “Aera save us, Eisalaan is surely on the verge of a mass hysteria.”
Adeline didn’t laugh, and the Queen narrowed her eyes. “Why are you not speaking to your sister?”
“Don’t know where you got that idea. I speak with her daily.”
“You don’t talk of the court proceedings?”
“She doesn’t tell me about the court proceedings.”
“And yet you’re clearly both curious and concerned,” she mused. “So why won’t you ask her? What is it, Adeline?”
“You need to eat something.”
She moved away from the bed, grateful when her mother pried no further. She retrieved the lunch tray from the table by the fireplace, then sat again and set the tray on her lap. Adeline scooped a steaming, aromatic spoonful of soup and held it to her mother’s lips. The Queen took in a small sip, and her pale, cracked lips curved into a slight smile.
“I remember feeding you like this,” she said. “When you were just a baby.”
Adeline arched a brow before she could stop herself, and the Queen gave another hoarse laugh.
“Don’t look so shocked. I wasn’t always so…” She paused, seeming to struggle for the word.
“Cold?”
She hadn’t meant it to come out so bitterly.
It was just the truth, as widely accepted as the fact that the sky was blue and the Laune was frozen solid. The Queen of Snow and Silverwasknown to be cold; beyond the borders of Eisalaan, her enemies whispered that her heart was frozen harder than the lake itself. This would not have been the first time the Queen had heard it said.
Selma winced all the same.
The answering silence was utterly airless, pressing painfully on Adeline’s ears. She gathered another spoonful of soup, clattering the spoon loudly against the bowl. Her mother didn’t look at her as she sipped it.
