Page 5 of Awakening the Beast
I pass him, making my way to the bedroom, but he follows me as I stride towards the en-suite, hoping to shut him out.
“You haven’t even asked where I’ve been or why the fuck I haven’t been here!” he shouts angrily from behind, making me halt in the middle of the room.
“I’m trying so fucking hard not to touch you, kiss you. I’m trying not to suffocate you with everything I’ve wanted so badly because I see how much this has hurt you. But you need to understand—I’m here to fucking stay! For you, Cree, and our baby.”
My teeth grind, and resentment surges through me.
“I will make up for all the lost time if I have to, and—” He tries to assure me, but his words only fuel my irritation.
I whip around sharply, brimming with tears as I glare at him. “You can’t!” I scream and he inhales deeply, facing aside, his frustration clearly mounting, but I’m not finished. “Why the hell do you think I haven’t asked you where you’ve been? It’s because it won’t change a damn thing or bring back any of the time we’ve lost. Nothing you can say or do can make up for the misery that me and Cree have suffered!”
When his gaze returns to mine, I grit my teeth and raise my finger to point at him, “You don’t get to just walk back into my fucking life and act like nothing happened. You don’t get to make this right with just a few words and kisses.” I declare, my tone filled with anger. “You may still be alive, Arlo, but you are still fucking dead to me.”
Flames ignite in his dark pupils and his nostrils flare as he storms furiously toward me. Instinctively, I back up until my back hits the door behind me. He continues, closing the space between us until his palms slam aggressively beside my head, trapping me between the door and him. Fear surges through me, but I lift my chin defiantly, staring back into his enraged eyes.
“Shut the fuck up,” he snaps through clenched teeth close to my face almost making me flinch before he dips down, his mouth moving to the side of my neck. “You’re going to listen to everything I have to say, and you’re going to keep that bigfucking mouth of yours shut before I show you exactly who you’ve missed.”
I stay completely still, my jaw set tight with annoyance. All I want is to escape, to process what the fuck is happening right now. I need some space to breathe.
I sense he wants to kiss my throat, to assert his dominance over every aspect of this situation, just as he used to, but if he tried, I’d be ready to beat his ass, even if I know I’d fail miserably. I understand I might be acting selfishly, but I can’t simply switch off my emotions or pretend they don’t exist. I don’t know why he left or what his reasons are, but the hurt, rage, and betrayal I feel right now seem so overwhelming.
“And what if I don’t want to hear it?” I say icily. “What if I’m just done with it all, Arlo?”
He stays motionless for a moment, absorbing my words. “We’re fucking done? Is that what you’re telling me?” he finally asks.
The heartbreak in his voice is clear, and it strikes me deep, making me squeeze my eyes shut and rest my head back on the door. I can’t bring myself to answer. I can’t give him the satisfaction of admitting that I still love him with every inch of me, that my heart never stopped aching for him and probably never will, or that I still want him. My cold ass won’t allow me too.
He draws back just enough to meet my gaze, but I turn my head, purposely avoiding it to hide my vulnerability.
He presses his forehead against the side of my head, his eyes tightly shut, “Don’t say that, baby,” he whispers. Tears well up, but I stay still and expressionless as he continues. “I tried so fucking hard to get back to you. I promise you I did.”
My brows crease with confusion, and a tear drips when I eventually blink. He lifts his head, and I look at him, searching for any hint of a lie, desperately trying to make sense of the storm raging in front of me. He cups my face, his hands warm, wiping my tears away with his thumbs.
“Not even death has the power to keep me from you, Wren” He murmurs over my lips, his tone a solemn vow. “Hell could chain me for my sins, but I would shatter those binds. Nothing in this world or the next could stop me from being by your side,” I stay silent, so he continues. “You saw what state I was in. I didn’t just walk out of that fucking mansion,” he repeats, and I glance down at his lips as the words leave them, my mind racing.
“Where were you taken?” I ask quietly.
He releases my face, standing taller and shoves his hands into his pockets, his expression hardening. “Mexico at first,” he begins. “Until someone found me, took me to some makeshift fucking hospital in the middle of nowhere until I healed, and then I found myself in Brazil.”
My heart races, but my mind spins with a million thoughts, unable to make sense of what to feel or believe and I jerk my head back with my nose scrunched up, “Brazil?”
He gives a small nod. “A young Brazilian guy who found me at the side of a deserted road in Mexico said he could get better treatment back home, so I laid in the back of his truck for four fucking days until we got there. I was in a bad way for a couple of months with no passport, no money, and no way of contacting anyone,” he explains.
I shake my head, placing my thumbs on my temples. “But why the hell would someone take you from the fire, start to treat you, and then leave you for dead in Mexico?”
He just stares at me blankly and I narrow my eyes, pushing for more. “Do you know who it was?” I ask.
He gives a small shake of his head and glances aside, his gaze shifty, causing my suspicion to rise.
My jaw clamps tight, anger bubbling under the surface. “You’re fucking lying to me, Arlo,” I grit out.
His eyes snap back to mine, and there's a flash of something in them—defiance, maybe even regret. “I have an inkling who was involved,” he admits. “But I could be wrong, so you don’t need to know until I fucking confirm it.”
His words hit me like a wave, the secrecy, the hidden truths. I scoff, feeling annoyance wrap itself around me.
“Baby, you’re going to have to fucking trust me on this one.”
My eyes flash to his, narrowing. “Fucking trust you?” I hiss. “The audacity that you would even say that is shocking. That’s the thing; I don’t fucking trust you, not anymore.”
