Page 98 of Burning Deceptions
I could kill his parents right now. But they weren’t here. I slipped my shoes off and padded to him. Luke rested both hands on the marble in front of him and had his head bowed between his shoulders. I pressed my palms to his back and smoothed them higher until I could knead his tight neck muscles.
“Luke.”
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“About what?”
“Tonight. My family. The inquisition.” He sighed. “I dunno. The food, the cold, every pothole I drove over. I just … Fuck. Why do I feel like everything is my fucking fault?”
I wished for an answer, for any answer to make him forgive himself. In this moment, one of the rare times in my life, words eluded me. Instead, I rubbed his arms and lay against his slanted back.
“Mind if I shower?” I whispered. “This makeup is getting old.”
“Yeah.” Luke straightened, and I had to relinquish my position. He didn’t ask me to follow him, but I did.
Up the stairs, there were two bedrooms. He led me to the larger one, then to the bathroom within.
“Use whatever you want,” he said as he flipped the light on. The harsh contrast made us wince. Then he blinked and turned away. “I’ll be downstairs,” he muttered on his way out, disappearing around the corner.
Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.
His bathroom was about the size of my dorm room. The shower stall was all glass next to a deep soaking tub I’d try if I didn’t need to get rid of Ashley as quickly as possible. I stripped, grimacing at the clothes, even the panties, that represented a façade I never wanted to be associated with again.
Freezing water battered me in my impatience to be free, but the cold burst of energy zinged in my veins. This wasn’t a shower to relax in. This was a perfunctory washing to get rid of all traces of the dinner and the reasons I’d been dressed up, needing to be me and no one else. I scrubbed my face once, then shampooed the product out of my hair. When it was time to scrub my body, I washed my face a second time just to be sure I got it all.
A bright white towel hung near the shower opening. It smelled clean, so I used it, drying off, with anticipation making my hands shake. I had to get back to him. I needed to, for him and for me. I needed to be close. I needed to keep trying to make him smile.
I rehung the towel, but my bag was downstairs. Luke had dropped it outside the bathroom in the hall. Using the light from the bathroom, I tiptoed around his bedroom, found the closet door, and …
“Holy fuck.” His closet was bigger than the bathroom.
Polished shoes filled the shelves on one wall. A row of suits hung on another. There was a low dresser in the center of the room, a tall dresser on one side. Everything was so neat and orderly, as if I’d stepped inside James Bond’s personal dressing room.
I stood blinking, unwilling to disturb anything. Welp, I’d wanted to give him Asher, so he was gettingonlyAsher. No clothes. No barriers. No deceptions. Nothing.
Nerves and jitters had me rubbing my arms as I carefully made my naked way down the darkened staircase. I wasn’t the most comfortable in my skin. Not that I had any huge esteem issues, but I had the body of a kid: thin, flat, no great muscle tone. The best things on me were my eyes and natural tan. Luke had seen both, so there was nothing to show off with me fully exposed.
A dim light from the open kitchen stretched toward the living room’s shadows, fading away before it reached Luke, who stood at a wide window and stared at the city lights in the distance.
Ice chinked in his glass when he took a sip; otherwise, all was quiet.
“Thank you for letting me use your shower,” I said as I stopped behind him. How weird it was to be completely naked with someone else still completely dressed. I wrapped my bare arms around him and rubbed against the material of his suit. That was kind of nice.
“Of course,” he said.
On flat feet, those pesky inches he had on me were more pronounced. I pushed onto my toes and hooked my chin on his shoulder.
“You’re too tall. I can’t see.”
Luke huffed, almost a chuckle, and moved so I could get in front of him. His eyes popped as he stared at my nakedness.
“Asher …” His voice trailed off as his gaze lowered.
Not allowing myself to feel shame or shyness, I fisted my hands at my sides to keep from trying to cover myself. “That’s right. Asher.” I lifted my arms and waited for his eyes to meet mine again. “I’m not anything more or less than me. I’m not your past or your future. I’m not your parents or their views. I’m notthis bad mood you’re in. I’m just me, and I want to be with just you.”
Luke slammed his drink on the coffee table, then slammed his arms around me and his lips on mine. He took a few steps, walking me backward until my legs hit the sofa and we fell onto it.
“You’re wrong,” he whispered, then kissed me again. I opened for him with my jaws, arms, and legs. I welcomed him with all of me. “You’re wrong,” he said again. “You are my future,” he whispered against my neck.
