Page 54 of Saved By A God
“You never annoyed me,bella mia,” I whisper.
Smiling, she shakes her head. “Thank you for letting me stare at you as much as I wanted and never getting upset with me.” Achuckle bubbles over her lips. “I mean, look at you. Hot, badass, in touch with your emotions. You’re so ridiculously beautiful, every other man pales in comparison to you.” Lifting her eyebrows, she grins. “Oooh boy, I better be dead, or I’m going to struggle looking you in the eye after spilling my guts to you.”
Somehow, she makes a smile tug at the corner of my mouth.
“I know you care about me, Enzo, and that was enough for me. You showed me in so many ways that I was important to you, and I’m thankful for every second you chose to spend with me.”
“But I didn’t tell you I love you,” I groan.
Regret soaks like a thick sludge into the destruction already sown in my chest.
“I want you to know there has never been anyone else.” She widens her eyes. “I even tried the one time, and…” She shakes her head. “Nah, I think I’ll keep that a secret, and when we meet in the afterlife I’ll tell you.” Her chuckle fills the air again. “I lived my life loving only you, and I don’t regret it one bit. If I got a chance to do it all over, I’d pick you again. I love the way you make my heart skip a beat. A single look from you makes my stomach flutter.” Her expression turns soft. “I kept another secret from you, and now is as good a time as any to tell you.” She shrugs while giving me a playful grin. “I’m not a slob. I made a mess so you would come and clean everything. I soaked it up whenever you made a fuss about me.”
“I knew, Rosie.” The words are nothing more than a whisper. “It wasn’t a secret.”
“I want you to find someone who you can love the way I’ve loved you.”
I shake my head, my jaw clenching as I groan, “Never, Rosie. It will always be you.”
“Stop being stubborn, and for the love of all that’s holy, stop beating yourself up for things that are out of your control.” Sheleans a little forward and narrows her eyes. “Or I swear to God, I will find a way to haunt you.”
“Please do.” I grip my shirt right over my heart and can’t keep a painful whimper from escaping. “Christ, Rosie. How do I live without you if you’re really gone?”
What if she’s dead?
What if…
“Close your eyes,” she says, her tone gentle. When they drift shut, I swear I can feel her. “I’m here, Enzo. You’re going to be okay. None of this is on you. I pressed the button. Don’t let my sacrifice be for nothing.” Her voice grows even softer. “Take a deep breath and let it out slowly.” I do as I’m told. “Know that I love you, that my heart will always be with you.”
I begin to shake my head again.
“Don’t fight it, Enzo. Let the pain move through you. Make peace with the fact that I’m gone, then get up and live the life I’ve always wanted for you. Let people in, the way you let me in.”
“You’re asking the impossible of me.” The agony destroying me makes my voice crack over the words.
“There is nothing I want more than for you to be happy.” She lets out a chuckle, and when I open my eyes, it’s in time to see her face crumble as she begins to cry. “I wish it could’ve been with me, but we both know that was never going to happen.” Rosie clears her throat and gives me a trembling smile. “I will always love you, Enzo.”
When the recording stops, I shoot to my feet. “No.”
I need more. So much fucking more.
More words. More smiles. More fucking time!
It feels like my heart is being obliterated all over again, then an arm falls around my shoulders. I realize it’s Dad as he pulls me into a hug, and I fucking break in ways I’ll never recover from.
Chapter 15
Rosie
Holding onto the bars, my eyes dart to the right when I hear heavy footsteps on the metal walkway.
As Kirill appears in my line of sight, I let go of the bars and take a step back. Like every other time he’s come to me, I glare at the bastard.
Then I notice the shackles, and a frown deepens on my forehead.
That’s new.
He opens the top slot, which they use to push the food through, and says, “Hands.”
