Page 17 of Solace in Seven
“Okay, okay. I got a question and all y’all gotta answer,” Lauryn declared.
“What did I miss?” Brielle asked, walking up on the three of us.
“Girl, you okay?” I asked, noticing her puffy, red eyes. I couldn’t tell if it was because she was high or if it was from her meltdown in the water.
Brielle bobbed her head, before running her fingers through her blonde box braids. “Yeah, girl. I’m good.”
“What happened out there?” Lauryn asked, giggling all over again.
“Bitch, I don’t know why I thought I was the lil’ fuckin’ mermaid or some shit. I got out on that jet ski shit and freaked the fuck out. I said ah hell no, get me back on solid ground, mothafucka!”
The four of us roared with laughter. “See? This is why I love you. You’re hilarious!” I told her, flexing my stomach muscles from giggling so hard.
“What can I say? My life is a film,” Brielle proclaimed. “But, c’mon, what did I miss? Tell me.”
Shauna spoke up and said, “Lauryn was about to ask a question and said we all have to answer.”
“Go ahead and ask it. I’m ready,” Brielle told Lauryn.
“Okay, so if you could build the perfect nigga, what would your top three must-have traits? And Cassidy has to go first because I asked her this shit once before, and she dodged me.”
“Honesty,” I blurted out.
“Mmm, yes. I can’t stand a lying ass nigga,” Shauna chimed in.
“Um, and he’s got to bring some level of success to the table. A nigga can’t expect me to bring the table and the chairs and put the food on it too,” I added.
“Mmm, preach!” Shauna boasted before turning the bottle of tequila up to her lips.
“And a third one…I mean, he gotta look good, right? So yeah, those are my three. I want an honest, successful, good-lookin’ nigga,” I broadcasted, secretly hoping the universe heard me and delivered. I wasn’t ashamed to admit I was big on appearance. I loved a sexy ass nigga.
Lauryn burst out laughing, her white teeth glistened just as brightly as her coppery-brown skin. “Well, good luck with that shit, boo.”
I sucked my teeth. “What’s the point of doing this if you gon’ poke holes all in my shit?”
She chuckled. “I’m just saying. If you find one, that nigga is a unicorn. If he’s good-lookin, that mean he broke. If he successful and he look good, then you know that mothafucka is a liar! That’s all I’m saying!”
“I hate to agree, but…she right,” Brielle agreed, propping up her pink-painted toes on the edge of the table.
“Right as fuck!” Shauna added, flashing her wide-gapped smile.
I sucked my teeth before my eyes crimped in laughter. “Ugh, shut up! Guess I gotta find me an honest, ugly nigga, but I don’t know if I can do it. Aesthetics matter, bitch.”
“Shit, he still might be broke anyway.” Lauryn snickered.
“What about the rest of y’all? All y’all got niggas except for me.What are three traits your men have that you absolutely love or you wish they had?” I asked, flipping the question on them.
Shauna spoke up. “I’ll go first—I’ll say I love a man that can use his imagination. Like, give me a nigga with a brain, a good one at that. That’s Trey up and down. It’s probably my favorite thing about him aside from the D.” She winked.
Laughter filled the open vessel once again, bellowing above the speaker. “Ain’t nothing wrong with that. If you would’ve told me I had four traits, a big dick would’ve been number four,” I affirmed.
“Shit, it should really be number one, but I’m just saying.” Lauryn shrugged, shaking her honey brown faux goddess locs from side to side.
I turned my attention to Lauryn and Brielle. “C’mon, Brielle, Lauryn? What about y’all? Answer the question!”
“Yeah, I did!” Shauna said.
“Fine, I’ll go next,” Brielle stated. “Um, I’ll say off the top of my head, and don’t judge me because y’all already know I’m fucked-up, and I don’t even know if it’s noon yet, but I love a nigga who is in touch with his feminine side. And I ain’t talkin’ on no bitch shit, but just someone who can be gentle and compassionate. I love that shit.”
